further from my home, the more i wish it

there's an ocean in my body

there's a river in my soul

"..Thank you." Sam said quietly with a soft laugh, happier in that moment than he remembered being in years. With Zeph next to him and the ocean below his body holding him up, it felt like a dream, something he would have come up with in his teen years to get him through the days.

The harsh wording that Zeph gave towards his father drew a shocked, amused gasp from Sam, the thrill of talking out so aggressively towards the man that had once dominated his life still there in his heart: he wondered if it would ever leave, if he could ever entirely put the past away. It was clear that Zeph's past still haunted the man every day: Sam looked over to see the firelight reflecting in his sad eyes and wondered how often the memories of lost wife and child came back to haunt his friend.

If they'd ever stop.

"Well....wh-whatever was right, I kno..know he must have lov-loved you." He said, gently reaching out to touch Zeph's shoulder (wobbling a little in the water, but staying floating); he had no doubt in his heart that he had done the best for his child. While all that was true, Sam could feel the mood of this happy evening very quickly evaporating and with a small smile on his face, added: "...Even...even if yo-you don't wash di..dishes very well."

Hopefully he was close enough to Zeph now that they could laugh together even in the difficult conversations.

if I see a sign in the sky tonight

No one's gonna tell me it's a trick of the light

SAMuEL

we used to play outside when we were young & full of life & full of love

Fuck, you killed the mood again. You'd wanted him to be happy, to enjoy the night, not to be buried underneath your shit. Exhaling sharply you force yourself to soften, to lighten, and turn back to Sam. "Yeah. I think he did," you agree, a little bit of warmth returning to your voice by the end.

His joke startles a laugh out of you, a genuine burst at the playful nature of it. "Oi, yer the one who moved in with a bachelor. Dunno what you expected." Splashing at him again, you consider attempting to drag him into the water as you might to another friend, but it seems rather a bad decision given that it's his first time in the sea. Instead you settle into the water beside him, treading slightly as you bob along.

You're not blind: you spotted the breasts beneath the curls, you know what he's told you about his upbringing. You can't imagine how brave he is to stand up to a goddess, to come out here alone, to be shirtless here in public- and fuck, you ought to be able to give him at least a little more. "Y'know, Red..." you begin, suddenly awkward. Fuck.

Clearing your throat, you once again look to the shoreline. Close your eyes. Take a breath. Smile just a bit. "...Whatever shit yer da might've done.... whatever assholes might'a made you believe... I'd've been proud as fuck'a Ray if he'd been even half the man you are."

zephyr

there's an ocean in my body

there's a river in my soul

It was good to hear Zeph say something positive, even better to hear him laugh at the joke; Sam grinned and flipped up in the water. "I-I'm a bachelor too and I kn...know how to w-wash a dish!" He insisted, though admittedly he didn't have to do it often, given that blood or fluid didn't usually come served like gourmet food.

He was quite content to float in the dark and silence with Zeph, just enjoy the moment; as the nickname he had so quickly grown used to was mentioned he looked over with a 'hm?', not expecting anything like what Zeph was about to say. When it did come Sam almost didn't know what to say, felt his mouth open but nothing come out: somewhere, deep in his soul, something was mended, but he didn't know how to express it.

Blinking back tears (he'd gotten much better at stopping them from falling recently) he let out a shaky, but happy breath and went to momentarily hold Zeph's hand, cover it with his other, before he said, as steadily and sincerely as he could: "Thank you. Tha..that means a lot to me."

All in all, it had been an amazing night. Swimming back to the sandy shore, Sam really didn't want it to be over - he dared to hope though, that with his plans to stay in Torchline longer, that he might find another night like it in the future.

{FIN}

if I see a sign in the sky tonight

No one's gonna tell me it's a trick of the light

SAMuEL