maybe that makes me a fool

now take what i offer, straight up the nose, down the throat

it's a bearable bruise on your conscious

He’s still recovering, vision mostly cleared up but blurry when he wakes in the morning and when exhaustion sets in — as if his mind is fighting to correct what he sees. It’s exhausting, but he manages, getting a bit stronger every day. The lightning scars are still raised and pink against his skin, but they’re manageable now — if nothing else but a reminder and something to run his fingers along in case he’s forgotten.

How could he forget, though?

He hasn’t, not a bit, as he slips through the familiar door to the clinic where Vai had wished to summon him — exhaustion clinging to him like a heavy blanket. “You wanted to see me?” He rumbles, a soft smile clinging to his lips, leaning against the doorframe of the clinic.

but don't it feel good? don't you feel calmer?

i am the way and the life in the best looking truth

It’s pouring with rain (when isn’t it) and it’s Vai’s turn to look after the clinic. Monsoon season has meant that it’s actually remarkably quiet, giving her time to write a letter for Sunjata to see if he has time to drop by. So when he walks in the place is almost sleepy, and it’s just Vai pottering about the reception area, taking clippings of the plants she and Nate have started growing there. The witch looks thoroughly out of place in such a clinical setting, but there’s no doubt about her effectiveness. Looking up at the sound of his voice, she smiles warmly in return, putting down her clippings and stepping out from behind the desk. ”I did,” she agrees, looking him over and ushering him towards one of the consultation rooms where she’d saved his heart from exploding helped him after the sea panther attack. ”I just wanted to check you over myself, see that you’re okay. I know Nate will have taken care of you, but... old habits. Indulge me?” vervain I am always on your side

now take what i offer, straight up the nose, down the throat

it's a bearable bruise on your conscious

He watches her set the clippings down, a comfort reaching him at the smile that she gives back to him. And then she’s ushering him to the room, Sunjata taking a moment to shrug out of the light jacket, to sit along the bed in a pair of pants and a sleeveless shirt, lightning scars raised and racing down the expanse of Sunjata’s arm while the starry sky within his tattoo shifts ever so slightly.

His gaze finds her again, a small nod granted while he waits for her to start her check up. “Of course I’ll indulge you, Vai.” He rumbles with a soft laugh that slips from his throat. “Kept my heart from bursting, I think it’s the least I can do.” He opens his arms a bit, letting her move him whichever way she wished, poking and prodding wherever she wished. “Thank you, by the way.” He can’t remember in the fuzzy haze of his mind if he’d thanked her or not. Better late than never, right?

but don't it feel good? don't you feel calmer?

i am the way and the life in the best looking truth

”I appreciate it,” Vai says, her smile turning a bit more crooked. She sets a sign on the desk to ask people to ring the bell if they need her attention, following Sunjata into the room once that’s done. He sits, and she wastes no time in getting started. ”Now, come on. Strong heart like yours - I’m sure it would have calmed down by itself eventually,” she says, the humour easy now that he’s healed up. The reality had felt a lot different the last time he was in this room. First things first - after washing her hands, she places cool fingers against his temples. ”Just checking my own work,” she says with a wink, eyes slipping shut so she can check the healing she’d done previously. He shouldn’t feel much, just a tickle in his skin maybe, and it takes all of half a minute. ”Steady as a drum,” Vai assures him, letting out a breath of relief. Given that she couldn’t really look at the rest of him last time, though, now is a good opportunity. ”How have you been feeling in yourself?” she asks. ”You look tired, if you don’t mind my saying so.” vervain I am always on your side

now take what i offer, straight up the nose, down the throat

it's a bearable bruise on your conscious

Eventually. It still warrants danger, however, and Sunjata’s eternally grateful that it hadn’t gone that far, hadn’t gone that way had he attempted the trek home with his racing heart only to possibly never make it back. But Sunjata shrugs off the comment, keeping that smile on his face as he breathes in deep — sombering bit as her fingers are placed to his temples and she checks his heart again.

“I’m glad.” He hums, eternally grateful that his heart was alright now, but the rest of it would take some recovery. If not physically, but mentally. He’d been struck by lightning and fought a giant monster, after all. It isn’t something to just get over.

Her question has his eyes opening again, focusing on her face. “Vision was very blurry the night of, been getting better. Just bad at night and in the morning.” He recollects before inhaling deeply. “I’m very tired. Not sure if it’s emotionally or physically at this point though.” A boyish smile sparks along his face with that, waiting to see what she has to say.

but don't it feel good? don't you feel calmer?

i am the way and the life in the best looking truth

He speaks and she’s already checking the lightning scar tracks along his arm, fingers tracing the lines of his veins, up to the shoulder where they snake away beneath his shirt. It’s enough to know they aren’t causing any problem (other than physically being there). ”You poor thing - I swear, every time I see you, there’s a new mark on you.” She smirks, giving his hair a good natured ruffle before reaching back to grab a stool that she might sit at his level. Raising her eyebrows at him, the smirk becomes an amused sort of grin. ”Have you considered that it’s both?” she asks, her fingers gently moving to his jaw now so she can keep him staring ahead. Vai looks in his eyes carefully, considering dimming the lights to see if it makes a difference. ”Is it blurry now?” she asks, sitting back and holding up a finger. ”Follow it, please?” Tracking a slow path left and right, she’s still looking at Jata, expression focused. vervain I am always on your side

now take what i offer, straight up the nose, down the throat

it's a bearable bruise on your conscious

“I’m running out of space.” He murmurs with a soft laugh. As the months go on he’s sure he’s just going to become a slab of scar tissue by the end of it all. Wouldn’t his father be proud? Vai sits before him now and he focuses on her, an amused smile clinging to his lips as well to match her own as she confirms it’s both.

“I considered it. Didn’t want to accept it though.” His eyes crinkle with a smile as she keeps him looking forward, fingers trailing along his jaw, his own gaze focused entirely on hers just as she’s focused on him. “A little around the edges.” He confirms. Vai would notice as Sunjata begins to follow her finger how his eyes seem to follow her finger easily, but his pupils seem to constrict and expand in the attempts to focus and shut the light out more and bring more in.

but don't it feel good? don't you feel calmer?

i am the way and the life in the best looking truth

”You are,” Vai agrees, sighing and offering him an exasperated smile. ”As a personal favour to me, would you take it easy this Longheat as well? I know you said Flowerbirth was supposed to be your time to relax, but...” She raises her eyebrows. He knows the rest - he’s wearing it on his arm, for fuck’s sake. A soft laugh escapes her at his response, Vai shaking her head. ”Hate to break it to you, sweetie, but the sooner you accept it the sooner you can start to get proper rest.” She falls quiet for a moment to focus on the exam, tilting her head a little as she tracks the changes in his eyes. ”Does it hurt?” she wants to know. ”And do you get sensitive to the light? Or is it just... blurred?” It doesn’t seem like it’s bothering Jata much, but it is something she wants to keep an eye on. vervain I am always on your side

now take what i offer, straight up the nose, down the throat

it's a bearable bruise on your conscious

As a personal favor? He snorts to that but agrees nonetheless. “I’m getting married. I should be having a relaxing Longheat. Unless Ronin has his way with the bachelor party.” His lips quirk in a crooked smirk of amusement as he imagines how not taking it easy that night would be. But at least it’d be better than fighting sea panthers along the beach. “I’ll try to.” He comments with a quiet hum, trying to imagine how he’d go about tricking himself into relaxing fully so he could heal better.

But then he’s following her finger, listening to her questions. Does it hurt? Not really — not after that small bout of healing she’d done to him. “No.” He murmurs about the pain. “Very light sensitive. Blurry.” A confirmation while he focuses the best he can, wondering what she might be thinking of. Was it a residual from the lightning strike?

but don't it feel good? don't you feel calmer?

i am the way and the life in the best looking truth

”That’s right, you are.” Vai’s smile brightens as she looks at him properly for a moment. ”Congratulations, by the way. At least there won’t be any monsoons to deal with.” Winking, she focuses back on the exam, lowering her hand and considering his answers. Humming out a sigh under her breath, Vai rises to her feet and moves over to the window, closing the shutters so it’s much less bright in the room. In the dim light she returns to sit before him, indicating for him to try and follow her finger again so she can track the dilation and constriction of his pupils. ”You say it’s getting bette, slowly?” she murmurs. ”...I’m not particularly concerned, if that’s the case. Keep track of any trends though, okay? And if it gets worse... well, you know the drill.” Tell Nate, go from there. ”Though, I’d like to see how you are in a week or so, if that’s alright.” Vai lowers her finger once more, offering him a small smile. ”Are you having trouble sleeping?” vervain I am always on your side

now take what i offer, straight up the nose, down the throat

it's a bearable bruise on your conscious

“Gods that’ll be nice.” There’s an air of wistfulness in his tone, a gleaming shimmer of hope that it'll even out and calm down, that he might be able to focus again on what was important in his life. Namely, his soon to be husband and wife.

He leans back a bit as soon as she leaves to dim the room, fingers running along the fabric of the bed while he waits for her to return. When she does and he follows her finger again, his pupils remain a bit wide in comparison to how they’d been before, but there’s the quiet rug granted by his pupils as they try to work.

“Slowly, yes.” He agrees, mulling it over. “I’ll keep track.” But then there’s a grin spreading across his face. “Y’know Vai if you ever get too worried I’m right next door. Don’t need to keep making me appointments just to check in.” He winks with an unfocused gaze, wondering if the point lands home or not because of it.

The subject of sleeping, though? “Ive had a few nightmares lately. Not the best sleep I’ve gotten.” It’s a bit quieter of an admission, but he’d admitted a lot more to Vai and she hadn’t judged him for it.

but don't it feel good? don't you feel calmer?

i am the way and the life in the best looking truth

Satisfied with his answers (and smiling a bit at his unfocused wink), Vai gets up again to open the shutters; his vision might be blurred, but hers isn’t and she needs to be able to see him. ”You may live next door but that doesn’t mean you’re always home,” she reminds him, returning to sit on the stool again and taking both of his hands, holding them palms up out in front of them. ”Besides, your husband-to-be is a doctor, Sunjata. I don’t want to step on his toes.” She raises her eyebrows as if it should be obvious. ”Though, if I’m at home then by all logic Nate should be here. So maybe a quick call in to soothe my frayed nerves wouldn’t hurt.” Winking back at him, she places her hands over his. ”I’m going to push down and I want you to try and stop me,” she say, eyes on the lightning burns in particular. ”I just want to make sure you’ve not lost any strength in that arm.” As he speaks about sleep, though, her expression softens, Vai glancing back at his face. ”Do you want to talk about it? Sleep will get you on your feet faster than healing.” vervain I am always on your side

now take what i offer, straight up the nose, down the throat

it's a bearable bruise on your conscious

He squints against the light as she opens up the blinds again, focusing on her as she sits and takes his hands into her own. “See, exactly. Nate gets to watch over me when I’m home, and when he’s not I’m sure he wouldn’t complain if you checked up on me.” There’s a bit of a laugh with that, sure that Nate wouldn’t consider it stepping on toes.

But he focuses on the task she gives him, pressing up on her hands. The left hand, his dominant one, does well. The right where he’d been hit by the lightning, however? It falters a bit in its strength much to Sunjata’s displeasure. He lets his gaze drop to his hands as he goes to try again with her instruction, mulling over what he wants to say.

“I don’t remember what all I told you. But… I get nightmares sometimes, of being back in that prison and hearing Luci tortured in the next room.” He pauses, keeping his eyes averted. “Lately it hasn’t been her, though. Sometimes it’s Nate, sometimes it’s Ru.”

but don't it feel good? don't you feel calmer?

i am the way and the life in the best looking truth

”Sunny, I’m pretty sure Nate wouldn’t complain if we chained you to the side of the house whenever he went outside, so you couldn’t get yourself into mischief,” Vai quips back at him, her voice terribly amused to say that it might actually stop him from finding trouble. She expects it, for his right hand not to be as strong, but it still furrows her brow in a bit of worry. She nods for him to try again, before taking his scarred hand between both of hers, feeling out the pathways of muscle and tendons in his forearm. ”You held the lightning rod in this hand, right?” she asks, knowing the answer but needing it confirmed. ”Apart from the weakness, the scarring, is everything okay with it? No pain, no loss of sensation?” It’s easy, to flit between the practical simplicity of a check-up and the more difficult subject of sleep - it’s how Vai finds it easiest to talk about the things that tie her tongue in knots. ”You told me,” she says softly. ”Not much, but... I do remember you saying. It sounds like you’re worried you won’t be there for them, if they need you.” vervain I am always on your side