maybe rage will lift me up

Rage, maybe rage would lift me up

It’d been a while since he’d swam in the ocean.

On lighter, better days, perhaps, when the world wasn’t so blinding and overwhelming, when he hadn’t been refined into something broken, beaten, and battered, when the earth hadn’t churned itself below his feet, pulled it out from beneath him.

And now, now there were fins and spots, sleek skin and flesh, a muzzle breaking over the surface, seeking air and oxygen, before bristling down into the depths – another predator to mark his skills, his forms, his attuned nature. Another way to hunt, to embrace the world around him, a son of the sea as he’d been worlds and worlds before, pushing, pushing, pushing himself in the waves, in the undulations.

It hadn’t been a pleasure trip – considering and contemplating a hoard of fish to be frozen in Halo’s wares for the winter, stockpiling as he so often did when the opportunity presented itself. His fangs enclosed over scales, and brought them back to a designated rock, where they could settle and deplete, where he’d be able to manifest them into his bag later, and carry them into the glacial terrain. Cyclical, a notion, a semblance, he could fathom and understand, snagging at the lines, at the tethers, never quite exploding into vehemence, but a nagging vitriol, ghosting over another lesser set of fins and gills.

DEIMOS

i am on a journey to discover what it's like to be free of all my demons

He’s a bit paranoid, honestly. This entire season he’s had to deal with glimpses of his least favorite person in the world, unsure if they’re real or not. So when he takes to the skies today on wings of leather and scales, a mammoth in the sky, it’s purely for scouting. To see if he sees it again and where to go from there.

He doesn’t find his father, thankfully, but he does spy something a bit strange, the dragon focusing its attention on a seal of sorts that dives within the ocean. Now, seals typically weren’t unusual to see here, but something about this one specifically was quite unusual. He wasn’t used to the spotted pelt, the strange way it seemed to move about. So he lowers himself down to get a better view, circling over the seal before slipping a ways away, to try not to appear as such a threat in case it were just a normal seal.

A seal far from home, he supposes.

SUNJATA

Rage, maybe rage would lift me up

Another dive, another reach, another stretch of fangs and speed, and he barreled swiftly into a rush of frenzied schools, scooping, snagging, feeling them twist and turn between his teeth. The fight was always futile, and he’d rise to the surface, to the basket he’d already partially filled, sliding across the rock and dropping his latest catch. Then back into the fathoms, where he might find some comfort in the simplicity – no one striking him down, no one breaking him apart, no one asking, no one questioning, no one becoming a ghost before his eyes.

A shadow broke over the vestiges, and he glanced up through the watery edges and veneer, to see a draconic figure. An inherent, instinctual pulse nearly sent him diving further, not to bother the beast, not to contort into fathoms he couldn’t possibly chase – except, upon breeching, his head resting along the glassy, wavy fixtures, he found he recognized this one.

In caves, while searching for lilies, while fighting off gore crows, while struggling to find ways to move forward. He should’ve known, and he nearly snorted, holding it back for a tether, a line, between attuned measures. Sunjata? And maybe he was wrong, and the call would remain unheeded, the impressions lost, the situation wrong.

DEIMOS

i am on a journey to discover what it's like to be free of all my demons

He’s half prepared to simply leave, imagining the seal was simply far from home, until he curves once more to pass over the creature and a booming deep voice surprises him as it crests through the bond. Deimos?! The dragon calls back, confusion clearly lacing its way through his system before he’s descending into the water, wings flared out acting as if it were additional floating devices.

He swims a bit closer to the seal, large head lowering into the edge of the salty water, inspecting the shift for what it was. New shift? What kind of seal are you? His voice rumbles with interest, gaze scanning over the spots flecked into the other man’s pelt. It was interesting, so unlike what Sunjata had come to grow used to when it came to the Sword’s choice of preferred creatures to slip into.

SUNJATA

Rage, maybe rage would lift me up

The General had been correct and astute in his observations, judging by the surprise and bewilderment funneling back to him. He suppressed a snort, for it would do no good along the water’s edges, and watched the great beast descend, straight into the sea.

He had half an inclination to wonder what it was like as the massive winged lizard, as some massive, potent being, as something with a stigma already attached to it in the back of both of their minds; regarding caves, regarding friends, regarding parallels of frozen companions lodged and lost. But based on the bizarre, nearly amiable state of the impending conversation (a rarity; given their predilections towards one another and all the other life-altering events), the Sword opted not to press the blade in already.

The seal was new, had crawled into the segments of ichor, skin, flesh, and bone only recently, along with other disastrous semblances he’d yet to discover. Yes was the foremost conclusion, shortened neck gazing downward at the rest of the fins draped from his hide. I am not certain. Leopard, perhaps. There’d been traces of them along the Arctic seas, along the emboldened cold; maybe that was where his mind had sharpened, grasped, and tethered lines to their existence. I am here to fish. As if to waylay the notion that there was anything else sinister, machinating, or calculating from the void, and then he’d sojourn back through portals with his catch, so Halo would be provided with some other sustenance in the upcoming months.

DEIMOS

i am on a journey to discover what it's like to be free of all my demons

It makes sense, he supposes, steel gaze and heavy scales head peering at the small seal in the water, waves lapping against an armored snout. Leopard seal makes sense. He admits, judging by the spots. Sunjata wasn’t too familiar with seals, either way, just the commonly found ones back in Korofi and the ones he’s stumbled across here. Aside from that he was mostly at a loss, anyway.

The comment of fishing has his head lifting up out of the waves, peering toward where the fish had gone, over toward a beach perhaps in preparation to return to Halo? His head shifts back toward Deimos, a quiet prompt lingering on the base of his forked tongue before he manages to send it down the bond. Want more help? He asks, steel focusing on the leopard seal again. It’d likely take the Sword days to get enough to bring back to Halo to stock up for the cold winter. They could cut it short if he helped out, at least.

SUNJATA

Rage, maybe rage would lift me up

The offer of assistance was considered; bizarre, in the way they still helped one another despite rancorous, embittered edges, and the seal turned his head towards the rock where’d been gathering the prey. It would take him the better part of hours and days to complete exactly what he intended, and he might’ve been content with that notion save for lack of efficiency and a multitude of other things to conduct. If you want, came his response on the deep rumbling tones – perhaps Sunjata had ambitions to hunt as well.

On those notes, the beast inhaled another breath, and dove down once more – a flick of restless, swift motion, before he’d encountered the same school of fish maneuvering slowly, obviously at a loss for survival instincts. His jaw gaped wide, and his fangs clustered around two, before volleying once more, thoughts weighing heavily somewhere in between the nuances of movement – a sigh yearning to break free. I spoke to Ludo, a pause, as if to reflect and surmount that this semblance was going somewhere. It said Ru was not with Mort. In case the Flood wished to know about the Valkyrie’s whereabouts – vaguely, since Hotaru had always concocted the means and measures of hiding away when she didn’t want to be seen; capable of great vanishing acts. So she is still alive. Somewhere.

DEIMOS

i am on a journey to discover what it's like to be free of all my demons

It’s not like he has anything better to do, the constant stream of checking the coastline of Torchline and the inner workings, subconsciously scouting for a man he hopes he never sees again. It’s fine, really, a distraction made well by Deimos’ acceptance of help. And so he drifts from the seal, to not bother him nor the school of fish he picks, instead diving into the water and finding his own pool of them, snagging a couple with sharp jagged teeth to drag back to the surface to place on the rock the Sword had designated.

He drops them off, turning back in the water when Deimos’ words reach him. That’s great. He says after a heartbeat of a second, and were he in his human form his brows might have furrowed a bit with the next thought that comes by. We thought we saw her… On the cliffs. But she vanished quickly. He doesn’t know if it had been a trick or if it had been truly her. We were all sick and she left. I couldn’t find her. Not when he got his wits about him again. She’d been long gone.

SUNJATA

Rage, maybe rage would lift me up

The distance was appreciated, though he wasn’t certain if he applied it through the attuned bond or not; concentration honed on applying his skills again and again. This was a far more overt method of hunting; there was no hiding behind brush, there was no spying from greater heights, there was no magic or weaponry involved. It was speed, swiftness, and sharpened teeth, powerful, potent jaws; the fish could dash away, but he was quicker, mightier, and far more potent. Clasping upon scaled tails and fins, embedded them along fangs, and pulling the prey from the depths and fathoms could’ve been another vehement satisfaction, had his mind not been occupied and applied elsewhere.

The impression of Hotaru on the cliffs, vanishing within the blink of an eye gave him some pause, a level of distinction as he followed through on his efforts, gliding towards his intended rock with his quarry. She has done this before. Disappeared without a trace, capable of blending into nothingness, into voids, into spectral dimensions, and then returning no worse for wear. She has always been a survivor. And with the cure in place, she wouldn’t be sickened – likely meaning, despite his trepidation and fears, that the Valkyrie was fine. And if she wants to hide, she is more than capable.

DEIMOS

i am on a journey to discover what it's like to be free of all my demons

He dives below again to grab a few more fish this round, popping up above the water as it rolls off armor plated skin, dropping them off on the rock before meandering back down again as he listens to Deimos’ deep rumble as it filters through his mind. So I have heard. He rumbles back softly, wondering what had happened to make her hide herself away again – whether the sickness had started her descent and until its cure has had her unable to come back, to explain why she had departed. Was it because of Kiada? Was it because of the illness?

Or perhaps it was because of him and Nate.

He dives below and snatches a slightly larger fish this time, popping out of the water again to add it to the collection, sighing inwardly to himself. We miss her. I’m sure you miss her too. But he’s not sure what else to add – their relationship tenuous at best most times, nothing seeming to feel like a safe topic around them. He doesn’t even know where Deimos is, if he’s still the General of the Grounds or if something else had captured his attention.

SUNJATA

Rage, maybe rage would lift me up

Sometimes there’d been no excuse for the Valkyrie’s sudden disappearances. Sometimes there’d been every right for her to cluster and sequester her way into the void. Sometimes he understood the very nature of it – yearning to do the same, but with responsibilities and weights on his shoulders, with too many other things at stake, he’d never sought it any further. There could’ve been a thousand reasons why Hotaru did it – and maybe she just didn’t need to face the world right now. After Kiada. After sicknesses. After everything else. The relief that she was alive was palpable enough, and he could remain, until her return.

Yes; a jumble of mixed emotions – and he attempted to push them down, down, down, not yearning to visit, to brew, in their midst with Sunjata present. Instead, other dive intertwined between long breaths, catching and casting his way through the fathoms, a cyclical edge, a rinse and repeat, manifesting the endeavors and abilities of what the shift could muster. Congratulations on your new role the General hastened along; an exchange of Governor positions, an entanglement of other political ties and threads.

DEIMOS

i am on a journey to discover what it's like to be free of all my demons

The relief that she was alive was shared through the bond, whether Sunjata realizes it or not. A missed Valkyrie that the Flood only wishes he knew the reasoning for, wishes he hadn’t been sick and not realizing that she had gone and vanished. But that was how it went, wasn’t it? Always at the least opportune times, left to sit and wallow and wonder what went wrong, whether it was too much, if it wasn’t what she wanted in the end after all.

So he dives and dives again, more fish found and brought back to the surface with his large scaled form, piling them up on the rock. Deimos’ next comment has his steel gaze slipping across to him, a small dip among the waves of thanks. Thank you. Remi told me I was the only one that was interested so I guess it wasn't hard to get it. He offers with a sensation of amusement that lingers down the bond, something to try and push away the dwelling sorrow.

SUNJATA

Rage, maybe rage would lift me up

The seal hovered over a thread and school of fish now, watching the angle of their shining scales, witnessing the pattern of their movements, biding his time out of a natural composure. When he spotted several weakened ones along the back, he sped through the depths, bursts of raw energy and power, before scooping them in between fangs, dangerously amused by the spiral of vehemence. Bridging his way to the surface, and dropping off the gilled creatures at the rock, he found the area filling quite well, and not much more to go before the baskets would be towering to the brim; adequate food for the Citadel and its inhabitants.

Then he lingered back in the water, following the cycle, endurance building back up again from the sickness, heart and lungs and soul ready to tackle earthen fathoms and strong, enduring depths. The Flood’s comment and response ensued a snort, then a proclamation. But you were willing. Even if no one else had been, the platitude towards making Torchline better, brighter, and stronger (perhaps; he wasn’t certain what Sunjata’s ideals actually were, political or otherwise) had fallen upon his prepared shoulders, rather than leaving the land into dust and ruin. Maybe it would go there anyway; but he wasn’t evading a thankless occupation, or bristling against the responsibility levied around him. He thought back to other aspects they’d discussed, and it somehow managed to wind forwards and back to those lingering in the Greatwood (because the General was insatiably curious, and honestly would yearn to be a cretin in the shadows, bearing witness to whatever was coming). I hear the Fae are interested in holding a trial over the Ascended.

DEIMOS

i am on a journey to discover what it's like to be free of all my demons

The pile was shaping up pretty well, but Sunjata doesn’t stop just yet. Diving beneath the waves again, he snatches another few fish, emerging to place them with the others before he lounges above the waves, letting the sun pelt against the black of his armored skin. His attention is brought back to Deimos, to the fact that he was willing, that he still is. Because Torchline was home. He hoped it always would be, that life wouldn’t snatch him away from it. Perhaps because he wanted a more permanent role to prevent that as well as his ability of self preservation among all else.

It was all conjecture anyway.

There’s a beat of silence after Deimos mentions the Fae, a slow nod of his large head in the water as a wave laps against the side of his skull. They are. A trial for those involved with the Mathair. He offers, the equivalent of a shrug being sent over. I told them it would be challenging, but we agreed that I would help and the Ascended in Torchline would be safe from the Fae. He doesn’t know if Deimos knows of Nate’s attack, of the scar that spans his husbands face because of it.

SUNJATA