let the whole world look in

NATE

Shivers tingle in the back of his neck, trying to spread down his spine, trying to conjure something to match what’s being sent through the ring. Bruises don’t last in this body, but Nate still groans as they’re painted on his skin, the rhythm of his hips stuttering, unlike his hand. Being able to do this, to drag Sunjata to this edge, to fill him with the kind of need that has him closing every gap between them, sates some hunger in Nate, but makes him more greedy, wanting more and more and more.

A keening moan leaves Nate, useless breath catching in his theoat and fingers on both hands twitch, squeezing with the extra stimulation. ”Good boy.” The rumble cuts through the sounds pouring from Sunjata, helpless and honeyed. It brings a sense of warm pride to his chest, one that overflows immediately, pouring through the bond. With his hand still holding the attuned still, Nate shifts, cool breath preceding the threat of teeth dragged under Sunjata’s ear. To drag against scars (and scars and scars and scars) and his spot. I know you want to give in, Sunny. So why don’t you? Is left unsaid, unthought. The hand on Sunjata's cock slows though, offering a chance to breathe, to actually respond.

killed my old self
but the new me isn't much better

// so now you've done a little wrong and you need to be forgiven,
by the vicar and the company you keep //

Having Nate back, the one person that knows all the buttons to press, all the thoughts that burn through his mind, it fires him up even more. And he burns and burns, electrical pulses through his body as he gives his husband almost everything he wants. Almost, because the attuned can feel the way Nate’s hands twitch, the way he seems to pause and stumble, however brief. It’s enough for Sunjata to throw himself more into it.

At least, temporarily. Because then Nate’s keeping him still, teeth dragging along his neck, over marks and scars, over that specific spot that Nate has chosen to be his. And he slows in such an excruciating way it has Sunjata attempting to move, but knowing he can’t. So instead, he swallows hard, feels that shifting within his throat as his mind comes forth, a bit of a treat because Nate’s been gone so long.

Sunjata crackles and crumbles under it, chest heaving, fingers tightening and running through dark hair to pale shoulders, claws dragging along the skin there until he pauses by Nate’s bicep and he can’t quite handle it anymore. He presses himself in closer, digs those claws in, a throaty and hoarse mental rumble is given. Please.

// this is the sin that i will confess to release myself
from consequence and everyone can tell //

SUNJATA

NATE

The more he winds Sunjata up, the more he winds himself up. It’s a simple enough equation, but Nate can’t seem to figure it out, can seem to fill the yawning need in him that only grows and grows. All he can do is soak in everything he drags from his husband, everything offered up freely. Nate rolls his hips up again, just as slowly as his hand moves, a heavy groan released in his husbands ear, just for him.

He is undone completely by one word, a guttural, silent plea that sends him surging forwards with enough force to have Sunjata on his back suddenly, teeth in his throat and hands dragging through his hair, working his cock frantically. There are claws in Nate’s arm, slick with fluid, but all Nate can focus on is the blood singing through him, the tidal wave of sensation washing through the bond. It would be overwhelming alone, but with everything else it has to be too much, has to be enough to snap the thread of tension and need.

Not that that thought slows him at all, or has him pulling back. He’s been gone so long. Nate wants to draw this out, wants to drag it out until it’s too much, until it’s almost painful. Until Sunjata begs him to stop. I love you so much Sunny. You’re so fucking perfect like this. Possessiveness swells in him, stronger than it ever has been before, and leaking towards Sunjata despite his best efforts.

killed my old self
but the new me isn't much better

// so now you've done a little wrong and you need to be forgiven,
by the vicar and the company you keep //

It’s excruciating, at least momentarily, until the plea leaves him mentally, his body tending and burning under the anticipation. The groan from Nate only serves to add more to Sunjata’s burning edges, but he doesn’t anticipate what comes next. It’s an entire, feral unleashing. And Nate’s strength paired with Sunjata’s inability to do much else other than go exactly where his husband wants him, has the Attuned finding himself pushed back, blankets and pillows askew as the sudden sensation of teeth in his throat racks through his system, with loud moans leaving his throat, colored and painted with Nate’s name.

In the bliss he doesn’t realize his claws digging in, in the fluid that begins to seep down them and his hand and arm, making a mess of things. He can’t focus on any one thing, other than his grip tightening on Nate, keeping him near as his back arches, as his hips shift and his body surges and surges again and again with electricity. And really, that edge comes upon him quick, but it’s the irony of Nate’s possessiveness that pushes him over, the purring words in his mind, the teeth still in his neck. He really doesn’t have a choice when it comes to a warning, it taking him by surprise all the same, leaving him clutching Nate and trembling and sucking down mouthfuls of breath as the glow hits him immediately after.

I love you, I love you, I love you– He manages, unable to get his mouth to work to say it aloud, instead his mental voice is throaty and hoarse too, a low hum of continuous pledges and vows, his claws retracting until his fingers remain, closing around the wounds he’s drawn in a silent apology.

// this is the sin that i will confess to release myself
from consequence and everyone can tell //

SUNJATA

NATE

The bite ends sooner than he would like, though Nate would never dream of complaining about it, especially not now with the ring, a more visceral window in exactly what he does, what he teases from his partner. Claws in his arm are a small, small price to pay to be in this moment, to feel the tether snapping in Sunjata. It feels like it lasts forever, a heaven carved out by nothing but their greedy hands, and yet it's gone in an instant, replaced by the attuned's heaving breath, by the heavy glow of contentment settling in his limbs, by apologetic fingers on Nate's arm and a silent mantra echoing in his head.

"Darling, I know." The shift is so perfect, it's nearly impossible to pinpoint the moment it happens. Hands that gripped too tightly grow gentle, soothing; arms that strove to pin Sunjata down pulled him close instead; the voice that had been a smooth growl shifting to a warm purr instead, out loud and mentally. "I've got you, I'm right here." And he wasn't going anywhere, not for a long while. Not ever, if he could do anything to help it, and he would do anything. Nate guides his husband to the crook of his neck, shifting them upright again, every action slow but purposeful. Blankets are pulled around them in a warm, dim cocoon, the hand spared immediately returning to stroke long sweeps up the attuned's back. Lips press to Sunjata's forehead, where he can reach, the ascended careful to not shift the other man too much. I love you too.

killed my old self
but the new me isn't much better

// so now you've done a little wrong and you need to be forgiven,
by the vicar and the company you keep //

He burns and he burns, until he doesn’t anymore – until it’s a simmer and exhaustion clings to every bone in his body, until Nate’s actions grow softer and gentler, a closeness and tenderness that Sunjata always craved. He’s cut off in his mental stream of words, a blanketed warmth that spreads over him as Nate adjusts them, his husband’s voice a warm purr in his mind and aloud, something Sunjata can’t quite reciprocate as much as he wants to.

But he tries, in the way that he remains easy to move and adjust until he’s where Nate wants him, arms slipping around the Ascended as his head finds its place in the crook of his neck, a blanket draped around them that keeps them close, keeps the warm body of Sunjata’s an inferno between the closeness of the two of them and the blankets that trap in heat. It’s not like he minds, however, settled easily against Nate’s skin, feeling the dance of fingers down his back and the lips pressed to his forehead.

I’m sorry about your arm. He murmurs, one hand unwrapping from around his husband to run along Nate’s arm, to the wounds he’d caused there, his head nuzzling into the crook of the Ascended’s neck, keeping himself close and simply running by feeling alone, to seek out the raised skin, the slight slickness of fluid.

// this is the sin that i will confess to release myself
from consequence and everyone can tell //

SUNJATA

NATE

Nate's arms grow tighter as his husband shifts an arm out of their embrace, the noise of complaint mostly stifled. The apology sheds some light on the movement, even if it is completely unnecessary.  "What, that? Didn't even feel it." A slow, dozey tone carries the warm joke easily, mumbled against Sunjata's skin, louder than he would otherwise, remembering almost too late about the replaced earring. "It's not like I've never left marks on you." Eyes close at the feeling of a concerned hand moving up his arm though, spreading heat in it's wake, even in the face of fluid and already scabbing wounds.  

If ever there was a chance for him to actually fall asleep, this was it. The warmth beneath the blankets is enough that even Nate is lulled by it's embrace. It's nothing compared to the heat of Sunjata in his arms though, the weight of him. Give them another ten minutes, and it will be utterly impossible to tell where one starts and the other begins. Nate wants to say something, wants to keep his tongue moving, wants to sing his husbands praises from the rooftops, and whisper them so they can be jealously kept between the two of them, but he can't, not in words.

In lieu, he offers something else, his own quiet apology. I'm sorry I was gone so long. Honestly, he isn't sure he'd be able to do it again, isn't sure the worry is worth the reunion, when instead he could have never left. Even if the majority of his setbacks were his own fault, a last minute deal with Sam, a... conversation with Amun, the latter thought sending a ripple of annoyance rumbling through him before he brushes it away, presses in closer to Sunjata.

killed my old self
but the new me isn't much better

// so now you've done a little wrong and you need to be forgiven,
by the vicar and the company you keep //

A low snort leaves Sunjata at Nate’s joke, nuzzling in closer and puffing a playful sigh of annoyance across Nate’s collarbone. But the hand drops from the wound created, lower to his husband’s hip, relishing in the warmth and exhaustion that overtakes his body. “That’s true.” He finally manages, aloud, throat hoarse and gravelly, a perfect result of what they’d just done.

The warmth and the lull is sweet, it’s all Sunjata’s ever truly wanted as of late, a closeness that he can’t describe yet seems to perfect between Nate and himself, one that always has been. But there’s a quiet apology crossing the air now, one that has Sunjata shaking his head slightly but keeping it nuzzled in close, before he’s planting kisses against his husband’s collarbone, up to his jaw, until he pulls away just enough to let his steel gaze flicker over Nate. It’s okay, Nate. He murmurs softly, flashing a soft smile the Ascended’s way, before a thought occurs to him.

The soft smile spreads a bit more, a hint of mischievousness settling in the glimmer in his gaze. “I found something new.” It’s quiet, his head tilting with a raise of his brow. “I thought… We could keep it secret, between you and me. I think you’ll like it.” He’s delaying it, but his shoulders flit through with soft black fur, as if an explanation as to what the new thing might be.

// this is the sin that i will confess to release myself
from consequence and everyone can tell //

SUNJATA

NATE

The words that leave Sunjata aren't exactly a concession of you're right, but the spirit is there. Nate's smug grin is there. There's no need to ruin the mood by commenting on it though, it's just not worth it. At least, not immediately, and not with something so crass as gloating. Forgiveness comes easily, and Nate lets it soothe him some, grasps onto the warmth while he can, while it lasts. While it doesn't come across in words, there is a distinct sense of I love you. sent towards the attuned.

Something new? "Well colour me interested." Nate purrs, his head tipping to follow his husbands, keeping their eyes locked. "Secrets too? Now you're just teasing." At first, he moves to lean in, to capture another kiss, but he feels something different beneath his hands. Even if it doesn't exactly feel different, the ascended assuming it's something he knows, something familiar. But it's long, where the panther isn't; soft, where the bull isn't; thin, where the bat isn't. Shifting back again, Nate let's his interest show plainly on his face, as if Sunjata can't feel it. "Don't keep me waiting, sonskyn."

killed my old self
but the new me isn't much better

hey young blood, doesn't it feel like our time is running out?
I'm gonna change you like a remix, then i'll raise you like a phoenix

Oh, he can tell that Nate wants to gloat, that the smugness that crosses his husband is nearly palpable in the air. But so long as Nate doesn’t give into it, Sunjata doesn’t either, instead sending more of that similar warm sensation over toward the Ascended, letting himself relish in it, thankful that he’s back and things are right again, that he can start to piece together his broken puzzle pieces.

One little puzzle piece is this new surprise, one that he thinks Nate will like very much. And even if the Ascended refrains from gloating aloud, Sunjata can’t help the quirk of his lips as Nate realizes the fur beneath his fingers aren’t typical. “I don’t want to come off too arrogant, but I think this one will be your favorite.” He says easily, a hum of amusement laced in his tones. “I need some space though.” Not a lot, but simply not to be so wrapped up in the blankets.

Still, he leans in and presses a soft kiss to Nate’s lips before pulling away and flashing quite the roguish, cocky smirk, before shrugging out of Nate’s grip just enough that he can shift. He shrinks down into a much smaller form than he is man, with large black ears, glimmering steel eyes, a maw that’s quite like Haai’s yet far more domesticated, with a long fluffy black tail that tries to wag in the tangle of blankets, paws that settle on Nate's legs.

A german shepherd, staring right back at Nate, pulsating amusement through the bond. What do you think? He asks, a decidedly canine grin spreading across his face, head tilting to the side.

wearing our vintage misery, no, i think it looked a little better on me

SUNJATA

NATE

Between the fur and the words that leave Sunjata, the ascended is interested, all but chomping at the but to see this new shift. When his husband says he needs space, Nate shifts, pressing back against the headboard and losing out on some of the warmth to instead watch the shift, the shrinking and the reshaping into soemthing that seems so Sunjata it’s almost a wonder that it’s new. And immediately Nate knows the other man is right, knows this is his favourite, knows it’s going to be fun to keep this secret.

”And I thought I was a dog person.” The joke rolls off his tongue so easily, Nate doesn’t even seem to have realized he’s made it, hands rising to tangle in the fur beneath newly pointed ears. The question snaps him out of his reverie, the distracted motion of finger rubbing soft curled into Sunjatas neck. I love it. Theres not an ounce of falsehood in Nate’s voice, his words more than proven by the way he leans in to press his cheek against his husband, leaning into his arm, soft fur.

It’s already his favourite, a fact that Nate makes clear by the way he shifts suddenly, pulling Sunjata back into his arms, into his lap, and snuggling close to him. Now we just need Haai and Pem in here, and it’ll be real cozy.

killed my old self
but the new me isn't much better

hey young blood, doesn't it feel like our time is running out?
I'm gonna change you like a remix, then i'll raise you like a phoenix

A feeling of a laugh is sent to Nate, Sunjata doing nothing more than the brief wag of his tail. But even as Nate grows distracted, Sunjata does too with the fingers that scratch at the bit of fur around his neck, his ears wavering as his head angles into it to take full advantage of it. I knew it. He sends back with all the pride and amusement that comes with simply being right.

The canine leans into Nate’s cheek as he presses it against his fur, completely willing to remain like this forever. But his husband has other plans, pulling him up into his arms, until Sunjata is splayed across Nate. A quiet hrmph leaving him before he settles, resting his head at Nate’s shoulder, paws hooking in. I think you’re right. He rumbles back, voice thickly accented and hinting at mischievousness. He sends a pulse for the griffin to come in, the wolf magpie cross much bigger than Sunjata was in this form, but she doesn’t mind it.

She hops up on the bed, curling up against Nate’s side, her back to Sunjata’s own, huffing a quiet cloud of content that’s mimicked by Sunjata as he nuzzles himself into Nate.

wearing our vintage misery, no, i think it looked a little better on me

SUNJATA

NATE

Of course this is his favourite shift. Obviously. It's perfect, Nate's thoughts and his husbands shifting together in a heady cocktail of happiness that he truly can't see himself falling out of anytime soon. Even with all the shit thats happened, the recent bad decisions, the ghosts haunting them, they have these times. And that's all Nate needs for everything to be worth it.

It's so much easier to wrap Sunjata up in his arms like this, so much easier to press in all around him, to be a heavy, comforting force. It's easier to believe that he can protect his husband the way he wants to. I know I'm right. He had to gloat now, while he had the chance, even just a little bit. Nate wants to lean into the good mood, doesn't want to miss his chance again. A single hand disentangles itself, to pull the blankets tight around them once more, his cheek pressing in against Sunjata.

Nate doesn't need to hear the call to know it's gone out, the sound of heavy paws coming up the hall not a surprise at all. If Sunjata was a furnace, Haai is an out of control bonfire, hot where she presses against his side. "Hallo, Min Mis." Close behind Haai is Pemota, pushing the door open and drifting towards the bed, a handful of tight circles spun around the group before she settles, floating peacefully and letting her light wash over them, through the newly replaced blanket.

killed my old self
but the new me isn't much better

hey young blood, doesn't it feel like our time is running out?
I'm gonna change you like a remix, then i'll raise you like a phoenix

Nate’s gloating only inspires a bit of a huff from the man-turned-canine, a playful roll of his eyes as his ears waver before perking forward as Nate pulls the blankets around them. And after a few moments, his head is resting against his husband’s shoulder, eyes closing as he hears the sound of paws approach, feels the shift of the bed as Haai hops up, encasing them both in the bed and the blankets, warmth bouncing between Haai and himself.

It’s comfortable, but nothing is quite as comfortable as it is when Pemota arrives, the starlit warmth melding with Sunjata’s mind and fur, calming and quelling the lingering anxieties in his mind, soothing him with Nate’s presence enough that he actually thinks he might be able to get a good amount of sleep. Still, Sunjata nuzzles into his husband’s space, not worried about poky elbows or claws or the pressure of paws, and lifts his head to stick his pink tongue out to give Nate’s cheek a brief lick, before tucking his nose under the Ascended’s chin to settle completely as exhaustion settles over him again. Don't go anywhere. He hums through the bond, some sort of hidden question within it.

wearing our vintage misery, no, i think it looked a little better on me

SUNJATA