From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
It's a pity they're not closer, that Nate isn't sure how to soothe this burden he's placed upon her shoulders. At the end of the day, it's better to know than to not, but it doesn't help to get through that day. He just nods, as his offer is accepted, as he works through his hollow platitudes. Time will be best balm, but for now, she has him.
In his absolutely professional opinion, drinks make everything better. Aurelia hops down from the table, and Nate leads them back out into the hallway, turning to walk deeper into the building, up another set of stairs and onto the roof. There's just a single detour taken, to step into an office and retrieve two glasses and a bottle of something honey brown. The roof is overgrown, and generally tended by hands other than his own, plants growing happily in the sun. Nate instead makes a beeline to a corner shielded by a large umbrella, a table and a bench waiting in the shade.
"Of course I can." Really, it was the least he could do, apart from setting a glass in front of Aurelia and filling it generously. "You have air magic, and fire magic." Again, Nate tries to keep his voice light, casual, a grin clinging to his lips. As if to add to his light tone, his fingers lift, wiggling as a light breeze rustles around them, ruffling their hair.
and that the world is always our fault when we did nothing, how did we do wrong?
Aurelia followed Nate up a separate set of stairs, another set. She hadn't realized the inner parts of the building were able to go up so high. Her gaze curiously traveled up the banister towards the sky as it crept up around them, the clinic's walls abandoned for the roof. She hadn't realized how suffocating it had felt, and how much she had needed a breath of fresh air. The floral taste and smell that came with it grabbed her attention. Even as Nate went for a nearby table, Aurelia hesitated by a particularly pretty ivy plant, running a leaf through her fingers. It stretched out around a bunch of other plants, slithering over any objects it could get its leafy clutches on.
Her expression hardened again, the sound of liquor being poured bringing her eyes back over to Nate. With a heavy sigh, she made her way over to a seat just as he finished filling her glass. Her brows raised and she gave him a grateful nod, bringing up one hand to rest it along the cold surface. But she didn't take a drink yet, feelings within her tightening her chest, suffocating her ability to relax.
Staring at the dark, amber liquid, her only response to his explanation of her magic types was a heavy swallow. Air, fine. She could live with that. Air was air, not exactly the worst kind of magic to have. But fire, that one made her bring the glass up to her lips at last. And she took such a hefty drink from it that it choked her up. The cough racked her, painful from the drink going down wrong, and suddenly her eyes were tearing up uncontrollably.
She set the glass back down and balled her hand into a fist, looking down, "I'm sorry, you don't have to do this, you must think... I'm... {something unintelligable}... for breaking down like this over something... like this. It just-" She bit back the tears, sniffling, using the back of her hand to wipe them away, fighting not to let more replace them. "Someone with fire- they killed my father," her gaze, furrowed and dark, lifted back up at Nate, wondering if then he might understand to some degree, "and... my life fell apart after that one fucking terrible, defining moment. It forced me to be someone I regret now, and now... I have that same magic, like it's just some part of me and nothing matters anymore and everything is so. backwards," she buried her face in her hands, shaking her head, letting her words fade into the open air. Her eyes blinked back up after a moment, reddened. "Must be payback for what I've done - to spite me or... something. For building character!" She added on miserably, bitterly, sarcastically, her emotional wounds festering beneath the barbed words as she looked away, across the roof. Her eyes didn't settle on any one particular thing, though.
Reaching into her pocket, she pulled out a box of cigarettes and took one out for herself. Then, she placed it, open, on the table with the box of matches - in case Nate wanted one, as well. Given that he was an Ascended, she wasn't sure. She heard they couldn't really indulge in physical things except for their bite but, she'd leave them there anyway. She took a long drag from the smoke.
and I've been thinking that when we thought the world would break us, that we weren't wrong
His brows lift at the sudden, greedy way Aurelia throws her drink back, after such a long moment simply holding it, but he doesn’t comment on it. Just let’s her have her moment, pours her another two fingers, then settles in to nurse his own glass.
”You dont have to apologize. Really.” To say Nate is not good with emotions would be a massive understatement, but he can try. He has no choice but to try, with the way Aurelia begins to breakdown. ”Its not like this is something little.” It was a huge change, and one that had a particular significance to the woman. It made sense. He could handle it. But he is relieved when she bites it back, a shadow of guilt flashing in his eyes when she looks up to meet his gaze. Like he’s some kind of voyeur on this moment, because at first, the only thing he can offer is condolences. He doesn’t get it. Not in the way he thinks he should.
Not until she continues, a finger in the monkeys paw curling in as she describes a state so uncomfortably familiar he squirms, trying to keep it from hooking into him. ”I understand.” He offers simply, painfully honestly. This time, he doesn’t meet her gaze when she looks up, his eyes locked distantly on a fuzzy little plant sitting near the table. ”If it helps, I think it’s more shitty luck than it is the universe conspiring against you. Things just happen, and whether it’s a blessing or a shit show, you keep going.” He doesn’t think he’s helping, isn’t quite sure if he’s trying to anymore.
His eyes drop to the box of cigarettes before his fingers reach out for it, a single smoke and match fished out of their respective boxes before he lights up. A habit is a habit, and there’s some he can’t bring himself to break, even now. They’re the only things keeping him human some days, he’s sure. ”I know it’s not what you wanted, but a fresh start can be nice.” In it’s own way. Most times, he was happier here than he ever had been before.
01-20-2021, 10:41 AM (This post was last modified: 01-20-2021, 10:42 AM by Aurelia.)
Aurelia
and that the world is always our fault when we did nothing, how did we do wrong?
"Yeah..." His gaze is anywhere but on her, and hers is anywhere but on him. Flickering over the table, to the peaceful greenery that exists around them.
That's it... That's all she can offer back, that's all she has to show that she isn't downright refusing to let this change be a good thing. Still, she can't quite reflect those beliefs back to him. Not yet, not with the state of mind she's in now.
Nate's helping, perhaps not in such an impactful way that she will look back on this and say 'that's what kept me from spiraling'. However, he is helping in a way that's enough to keep her afloat... to keep her willfully strong against a current that threatens to drown everything.
At least he's there to give her a lifeline of sorts, even if he isn't sure or isn't good at this sort of thing. Aurelia can see that. She can understand, too.
She pulls one of her knees up to her chest, resting her foot on the seat beneath her, and sinks into her drink once more. She stays for a while, long enough to let things settle, to fade into the background as Nate likely has to return to his work. Cigarette smoke continuously drifts among the ferns and flowers until there's not much left to think about.
~fin.
and I've been thinking that when we thought the world would break us, that we weren't wrong
