A brief trip to the Outskirts at the start of Deepfrost had revealed some… unusual fauna scampering about in the snow, nearer the barrier than most large animals dared to come. The squirrels around here could be unusual, but the one Jigano had found had too many eyes, and he thought he’d caught sight of a mouse with an extra leg. It was certainly a strange observation, but he’d been interrupted before he’d managed much more.
With the cold, he was wary about who to ask along to help him with his notes, but his friend Samuel was a welcome and obvious choice, not least because the bard had hoped to speak more with his friend, and give him something that even now rested in a pocket of his capacious sleeve. That the Ascended wouldn't be harmed by the cold was certainly a bonus!
So it was that the lorekeeper had left a note in the Atheneum for Sam and made his way out to the edges of their world, keeping to the fields but not far from the edge of the woods, in hopes of finding a larger array of animals to study. He was well-bundled up in a white knit hat, pale blue scarf, and grey gloves that mostly matched his cloak, and held a familiar grey notebook at the ready as he waited for his friend to arrive in the subdued light of a heavily-clouded afternoon.
It was a miracle Sam had seen the note in the Atheneum. Since he had gotten the upgrade from Isla he had been thoroughly distracted from his life. Tasting every tea in his cupboards, running his hands on anything he could find, standing in the wind at night just to feel the sting of the cold on his face; it had all been the most overwhelming, wonderful, awful, amazing experience.
He had gone to the Atheneum to feel the books there. Many of them were very old, with crumbling pages and cracked leather, and he was hungry for as many textures as possible to touch. Curiosity as to what it would look like now had lead him down to the Loreseeker's hall, where he had found the note.
It had cut through his delight at the touch of the paper (so fragile in his fingers!) when he had realised he was being asked to go to the Outskirts. Fear had kept him away from there his whole life, a healthy idea of how dangerous the barrier could be more than enough to warn him. But Jigano needed him...and so Sam had to go.
He had little in the way of warm clothing, not having needed it for many years, but he managed to find an old hat (not really made for this kind of journey, wide brimmed and straw, but it was something) and some gloves with a hole in the left palm. It was a start. With his usual coat he had headed out to the Outskirts, a little bag on his back containing some pens, ink and a couple of thin notebooks.
It took him a while to find Jigano, partly because he got distracted touching grass, but he eventually walked up behind.
"Jigano. Hello. I um..I've never been here. It's...cold, isn't it?" He hoped to surprise his friend with the news of his upgrade, stomping his feet for extra effect.
"It is indeed," Jigano agreed cheerfully, turning to face his friend with a smile in spite of the tiredness that was becoming his constant companion. At first he thought the question was simple courtesy - an observation, a comment on the weather that was standard for polite conversation. But for once Samuel was wearing gloves and a straw hat and if they didn't match, well, they were still kind of charming as he stomped his feet. "I see you've made some additions to your wardrobe," he added, voice light. "Working on blending in? I'll see if I can wheedle a green knit hat from one of the Rathskeller patrons as part of my payment."
He hummed thoughtfully for a moment as he glanced upwards, checking the sky. The clouds didn't seem inclined to lighten anytime soon, and in fact he thought he saw a few small flurries drifting down. Hopefully it wasn't going to start snowing in earnest before they'd made any progress! "Shall we start walking? Our best bet is probably to see if we scare anything up and then observe as many details as we can before it goes back into hiding. Out here I expect it will be mostly small creatures - mice, squirrels, rabbits, songbirds, that sort of thing. Or do you have another suggestion?"
Jigano noticed his new outfit but didn't seem to understand the meaning behind it; Sam supposed that made sense given that Jigano clearly knew nothing of the upgrade. For the moment he didn't say anything, just nodded to the suggestion of the hat. "...Th-that sounds good. My f..favourite colour is green. You don't need to pay me, though." The concept of payment hadn't even occurred to him; this was just a part of his new Loreseeker duties.
This was Jigano's mission so he thought it best to let him lead the way. "W-whatever you want to do." Honestly, while Sam did want to do his best in this task, he was distracted anyway; the crunch of frozen grass under his feet, the cold air, the overwhelming smells of everything taking his mind over far more than documenting animals.
"B-but we probably shouldn't get too close. To the barrier. It's...I've never been there but...it's b-bad. It might hurt us." Another terrible hint as to his current state dropped, Sam followed Jigano wherever he was walking to, looking out for any animals scared out of hiding.
Jigano tilted his head curiously at Sam's phrasing, then blinked. "Oh! I... I apologize, Sam. I meant the hat as a gift. And that I'd ask for the hat in payment from my Rathskeller audience, since some of them are skilled at knitting and sewing and such." He chuckled giving a rueful shake of his head. "Sewing, I can do for simple things. But knitting is, alas, not one of my skills. Though, speaking of gifts..." He cleared his throat, feeling the slight weight of the charm in his sleeve. "I, ah... have something for you. If you want it. Perhaps after we've finished today?"
As they began to walk, the bard nodded at Sam's kindly-meant warning, his expression thoughtful. "Yes, Isla put a warning notice on the board around the time I arrived, I think. And when I came out with... Hm. The 'magic-testing' group earlier, an Ascended approached the barrier and was knocked nearly unconscious." He shook his head, grinning ruefully as they tramped along. "So, no, I'd rather we didn't get too close. But I'm curious what the effects of it are on the animals out here. I assume it kills them if they get too close, but what about the ones who merely live near it, close enough to feel that unsettling vibration without getting close enough to come to immediate harm?"
He shook his head, humor fading to thoughtfulness. "We still understand so little about it... are they any stories passed down among your people, Samuel? The ones who have lived here for generations?"
"Oooh. I...I see. Sorry." Would Jigano be offended now that he had implied payment for this was at all ever expected? Sam was glad it was quickly brushed past. Though learning that Jigano had brought yet another gift for him was both exciting and nerve-wracking. He tried to make himself remember to bring something for the other man next time they met. Two gifts to none was not a good ratio in a friendship, he felt.
To hear that Jigano had already been close to the barrier, had 'tested' it...Sam stared with wide, scared eyes. He knew his friend was brave but it seemed foolish to go to the barrier willingly. "An...Ascended?" The phrasing, rather than use of a name, did make him feel a little othered, but Sam didn't bring it up. "Who?"
He looked about for animals around them as they walked, but could not see any as of yet. Likely trying to avoid the cold, he thought. A lot of them probably hibernated. Jigano's question drew him from his search and made him tap his finger to his chin as he thought.
"Well...I have heard. Different things. Some people th-think it's punishment. From the Gods. For...something. Others think it's...protection. From wh-what's out there. It's just...always been there. I don't think anyone really knows." A little wistful smile took over his face. "My fa-father. He used to tell me it was full of eyes that watched you, and t-told the Gods if you were naughty. I don't...think that's true."
"There's nothing to apologize for," Jigano reassured his friend with a fond smile. He moved on without thinking twice about the mistake, aside from a brief mental reminder to himself to word things more clearly in the future.
He gave a little shake of his head at Samuel's wide eyes, a soft chuckle in his throat. "Oh, don't worry. I was just along to take notes, and I didn't get that close to it. The man... I didn't know his name." Jigano frowned a little at the memory, glancing away. "I later heard that it might be 'Archibald' or something like that, but I'm still uncertain. The expedition's leader asked him to touch the barrier since, ah..." Jigano gave his friend a sad, lopsided little smile. "Well. He said something about Ascended not feeling pain or having the same organs to be damaged. The man did what the mage asked of him, and paid a price for it." He tilted his head, smile turning a bit rueful. "It's not something I want you to have to experience, my friend."
"Punishment or protections, isn't it always?" the bard murmured ruefully, glancing at the barrier as they paralleled it. "I'm not sure these gods are into 'fairness' and punishment in quite that way. But who knows? Maybe they--hey!" A small bird burst from the snow almost at their feet, heavy wings whirring as it flew up and away from them, and from the barrier as well. Jigano squinted after it eagerly, noting the patchiness of its feathers and what looked like a second pair of stunted, useless wings emerging on top of the more normal set and interfering slightly with its flight. As soon as he fixed the details in his mind's eye he pulled out his journal and a marking stick and began writing in swift, steady script. "Sam, did you see that?" he asked, curiosity mixed with solemn sobriety at the poor creature's handicap.
"Archebold. Ugh." Sam wrinkled his nose, a rare moment of outward dislike. "He...he is not a nice person." But hearing that he had done something quite so stupid as touch the barrier brought him down a few further pegs in Sam's mind. He wasn't only just mean, but missing several brain cells, apparently.
He was about to point out that the barrier was not necessarily a fair punishment anyway when the bird appeared before them, cutting off his train of thought. For a moment he just stared before he remembered what they were here for. Scrambling for one of his notebooks, he quickly inked up a pen and drew a very simple diagram, a circle for the body and one for the head, then two long lines for the working wings, and two small lines for the useless ones.
"Yes! I drew...a..b-bad picture. But just so I would remember." Holding it up to show Jigano, he pondered the bird's existence. "I suppose...I suppose if it can f-fly anyway, it isn't so bad to have extra wings. Just a little slower." He brought the book back to himself, and gasped as he sliced the page along the hole in his glove - sharp pain accompanied the leak of fluid, and he hissed, holding his hand.
"No, I don't think he is, either," Jigano agreed wryly. "I certainly don't care for him or his company." Or his arrogance or his threats, but since Archebold was not a fun topic for either of them, the bard let discussion of the man drop. Besides, he was more interested to hear about the Naturals' beliefs about the barrier, and Sam's own family tales about it, and he would have continued his line of questioning if not for the sudden flight of the grouse.
He flashed his friend a quick grin at Sam's swift and eager affirmation, and looked to his drawing. The bard blinked for a moment and then nodded, smiling at the diagram. "That's a good idea. I didn't even try to draw it, but thanks to you I don't need to." Not that his own attempt would have been much better. The bookmaker's picture was simple but effective enough to get the point across.
"Yes... that's a good point. I suppose if they kept it from flying at all, it would have been eaten by a predator by now. And maybe because it's slower it still will be... but it's made it to adulthood and at least has a chance to have chicks. Though, whether the extra wings will be passed down..." The lorekeeper shrugged. "We'll have to keep an eye out for any others like it. Try to see if it's a family trait or a one-off." Beginning to walk again, he tilted his head at Sam with a smile.
"But you were saying something about the barrier having eyes? I feel like, as a child, that would have frightened me into nightmares for years! Which I suppose was kind of the point... I don't know that I would have gone anywhere near it until I was at least a teenager!" Sam, though, had said this was his first time out here, hadn't he? "What do you think its purpose is?" He asked curiously. "Not what other people think, but what you think?"
Sam was glad Jigano approved of his drawing. Quickly, he noted 'bird with two wings' next to it in a surprisingly neat script then closed the book and kept it in his hand in case he had to draw anything else in a rush. "M..maybe they have some kind of advantage. ...It could c-carry something in them, maybe." He didn't want to think of the bird having difficulties or struggling with it's chicks, so told himself the wings were useful somehow and it would be fine.
The story of the barrier's eyes had frightened him in infancy, though he hadn't been here as an adult more because of the very real fear of the barrier's destructive power. Everyone knew someone who had been foolhardy, had decided they would lift the veil...and never came back.
"I...um. I mean I don't...kn-know much about the Gods. The Old ones...th-they won't talk to me, since I'm Ascended. The Voice...I don't think sh-she has anything to do with it. But no one seems to like it. So...so maybe it is from something outside. Something th-that can contain even the Gods. Honestly, I..." Sam shrugged. "I'm fine w-with it. I have enough space in here. Having all that...whatever is out there suddenly open...i-it would be terrifying. I would not leave my shop anyway."
"Maybe," the bard mused thoughtfully, though he wasn't sure what the stunted, mutated limbs could support. Samuel seemed to feel bad for the creature though, and Jigano didn't blame him. Not as gentle as the Ascended was, nor as much as the loreseeker treasured that gentleness.
"The old gods won't talk to Ascended?" Jigano asked curiously. That was news to him! But then, the only god he'd personally spoken with had been Ludo. He had witnessed the Voice who had... tolerated his presence - or, rather, ignored him - when dealing with others, but that wasn't the same as welcoming him. But: "You're braver than you think," he said gently, smiling at his nervous friend. "Being afraid of the unknown is... well, normal, I think. But I've seen you act in spite of being afraid, and that is nothing less than courage. Still, I don't think you'd have to leave, if you didn't want to. Removing the barrier would mean that people could travel if they wanted to... not that they would have to, if they didn't."
"What you said before that, though. 'Something that can contain the gods'," he repeated quietly, thoughtfully. His feet continued to move over and through the snow, but his brow furrowed hard as he turned the phrasing over in his head. "Yes... something about that feels right. If they had put it up with a good reason, wouldn't they have told their worshipers why? And the oldest gods, the ones named in the books in the Atheneum, the ones that Amalia prays to... they're not here, are they? Not in any wakeful state, at least. Though perhaps, like the Voice was, they are trapped or sleeping?" The questions were mostly rhetorical, but he looked to his friend with a lopsided smile to hear what the bookmaker had to say.
It was at that moment that he realized Samuel was... leaking. And holding his hand as though it... hurt? "Samuel are you... alright?" he asked tentatively, a dawning fear in his eyes as some of his friend's earlier comments took on an unsettling significance.
"Well...th-they talk to me, but only to tell me to leave. Last time I went..." Sam hugged himself, remembering the searing pain. "They sh-shone the sun on me. So it hurt. And they were very angry." He had no idea who the voice he had heard belonged to, but just to be safe he had told himself he would never speak to any of the Old Gods or ever try to again.
Jigano's kind words about courage made him smile, but Sam knew it wasn't quite that simple. He did act when he was scared, but only after a moment of panic and terror where he would try to hide. He looked at people like Jigano who seemed ready to leap into a battle or a conversation whenever it would come and felt incredibly inadequate.
"I don't think A-amalia likes me..." He mumbled. Sam didn't know her well, but she'd always seemed to be anxious around him. He supposed if she was a fan of the Old Gods it made sense she wouldn't care for him. If only he could have told her that he understood, that he hated everything his gift represented too. "I don't...d-don't think the Old Gods are trapped. I just think they're...outside. They're too big and p-powerful in the stories for this to stop them. The ones who are here...must be smaller."
Jigano took note of the cut on his hand, which Sam had been alternating between rubbing on his side and bringing to his mouth. "Oh. Um. I will b-be. It's just a little cut. You see...Remi did something w-wonderful. He is so lovely, Jigano. He has let me...l-let me feel."
The bard blinked in surprise at hearing how strongly Sam had been rejected by the Old Gods. He reached out a hand to rest it gently on the Ascended's shoulder, if Sam would let him, a brief and reassuring contact. "I'm sorry," he said softly, squeezing gently in sympathy.
He trusted Sam's smile, and did not realize how little his words reassured his friend. But the mention of Amalia had his brow rising in curiosity. "I didn't think she liked me, either, at first," he admitted with a little smile. "But then I discovered that she is also shy, and cautious around those she doesn't know. I hope it is just that since you are both shy, it is hard to start a conversation between you... but if you'd like, I could talk to her about it?" He didn't normally like playing 'matchmaker' even in a platonic sense, but since Sam and Amalia were both members of the Loreseekers, he felt responsible for helping the guild to operate as smoothly as possible.
Controlling, Remi would undoubtedly call it, but he didn't like seeing his friends unhappy if he could help. And he had to least try, for they had been generous enough to join him in his endeavor, and he owed them his best efforts to make the guild a comfortable and rewarding place to be.
"That makes a lot of sense," he agreed to Sam's opinion on the gods, smiling. "More than anything else I've heard or read. Which begs the question... did the Old Gods create the barrier to contain one or all of these other gods within? And why?"
Hearing that it was going to be alright was enough for Jigano to start to relax, but the mention of Remi had his expression falling into neutral lines, though he managed to keep himself from tensing. "Ah. I... see. May I ask... what exactly did he do? And... how much do you feel? It sounded like that cut hurt... can you feel anything other than pain?" His question held an edge of desperation, an uncertainty and fear that had his pulse speeding up in spite of his best efforts to stay calm and wait for details. Sam seemed happy, thought so... surely, any 'adverse effects' couldn't be too bad?
Sam allowed the touch on his shoulder but was clearly uncomfortable with it, not sure what to do with pity. He had probably deserved the attack from the Old Gods anyway for daring to bother them with his Ascended problems.
"Oh. N-no. I'll..if I need to, I can. Work it out." He reassured Jigano, finding the idea of a forced introduction much worse than anything he could do himself with Amalia. At least if they just stayed quiet and civil, it was equal. If she found out he'd told Jigano to get them closer...it was a social maze he didn't know how to navigate.
He could do nothing but shrug and look lost at the question of the Gods. He had never been a theologian, content to let the mysteries of the heavens spin on above without him. Sam hated that he even had to regularly see a God at all in the form of the Voice.
He noticed how Jigano's face fell at the notion of his upgrade, but couldn't think why. Was his friend not happy for him? He knew Jigano had wanted him to accept himself, but this was an easier way to do that. It was a way to love himself while still having what he wanted. That Jigano's distaste could be to do with Remi did not cross his mind. "He made a b-band. For my wrist. It lets me feel."
Sam held out his wrist for Jigano to see, though there was only the barest of ridges around the band's edge, the upgrade nearly entirely blended into his skin. "He..He made Isla give it to me and I thought..I th-thought she'd made it at first. But no. It was Remi. I can feel everything, Jig-Jigano. Cold and hot and I can taste things and smell them too." With a voice not unlike an excited child he continued to describe his newfound joys: "Did you know te-tea was so varied? And..and flowers all smell d-different! And the snow has a smell!"
Suddenly he looked down to the ground and smiled down at his boots, looking like if he could blush he would. "...And...and m-me and Remi are getting closer. I found out he made it...on our d-date."
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