only everything you do

he had eyes like rain & hair like waves
& a soul as vast and deep as the ocean

'I met Hotaru.'

Pushing open the heavy doors that lead into a vast room smelling fragrantly of book bindings and almost nothing else, Remi's head lolls slightly to the side as he reconsiders. "Twice, actually." After so long having been entangled with the Flood, it's strange that it has taken so long for the alchemist to finally meet the last point of the Wrenzoak triangle. Especially now when that shape had all but been destroyed.

Holding the door open for Ronin with a gracious sweep of his hand to let his husband go in first, the alchemist pauses just a moment to let his eyes acclimatize before scanning what sparse section-markers he can see. Looking wildly out of place with his unkempt curls and toned muscles, were it not for the Collegium's association with Finn, this is one of the few places that the alchemist might have felt totally at ease. 'It is this way, I think.' He whispers, nodding toward a set of stairs that will take them up to one of the mezzanine levels.

THE LULLABY

& i guess i didn't mind  d r o w n i n g  in him.

I shouldn't laugh, but I know I'm a failure in your eyes

"Oh shit, you did?" This isn't the Archive and Ronin doesn't technically have to whisper, but his voice is still low as he ducks in through the heavy door his husband holds open. This is not a place where Ronin feels totally at ease - he has always felt as though he's been haunted by paperwork of one kind or another, and places like this are full of it. Scholars and bookish sorts that like to make him sign things and write reports. He's not wrinkling his nose, but it's damned close.

"How is she?" he wonders as he lets Remi take the lead with their directions, and as he motions for the stairs the Star makes his way over, reaching back to hold out a hand for Remi. "Or rather where is she, I should say." He'd known she'd left, but not if she was gone from Torchline, and with it being monsoon season, well. Not an ideal time to be without a roof over one's head.

"Where are we going again...?"

RONIN

he had eyes like rain & hair like waves
& a soul as vast and deep as the ocean

'Mmmhm.' Remi hums musically under his breath. He isn't keeping his voice down for the sake of those engaged in various things at the various tables, but because he wants to hear the sound of it. The scratch of quills on paper, the shuffling of parchment, excitable voices amidst the scooching of chairs on the floor..it reminds the alchemist of a very different time indeed. One long enough in his past that much of the melancholy has fallen away, leaving only a mostly-shiny memory in its place.

"It is not as though we know each other well so I did not really get the full measure of it." The Lullaby replies a touch vaguely as his hand slips into his husband's. "About how you would expect, though." As for where? "In Halo. I met her hunting out in the Tundra."

With a boyish snort, Remi raises a brow as he tilts his head and flutters his lashes leadingly in Ronin's direction. "Oh, don't you know?" He wonders, taking the steps two at a time to pass his husband. "Perhaps you shouldn't try to lead if you don't know where we're going." Remi adds with a grin as he tugs Ronin along after him.

"And the answer, is that we're going this way."

THE LULLABY

& i guess i didn't mind  d r o w n i n g  in him.

I shouldn't laugh, but I know I'm a failure in your eyes

Ronin doesn't press his husband for answers until he's good and ready. He's almost ignorant to the small details that Remi relishes; the smell of paper for the Star is just that, and the way the banisters have been made shiny by hundreds of hands is lost on him. But he knows it's important for the man at his side, and so even though he has no idea where he's going, he still strolls along so they might experience more of whatever it is that the Lullaby finds so pleasant.

"Ah," he says, about Hotaru being about as well as expected. And then, "Ah," to hear that she's in Halo of all places. "That's... yeah, that's quite a change," he admits, laughing under his breath as he stops tugging Remi along and ends up stumbling to catch up with him. They reach the top of the stairs and he turns to follow after the Lullaby. "This way? Well, that is very informative, husband. I can't believe I didn't figure that out myself." He grins.

RONIN

he had eyes like rain & hair like waves
& a soul as vast and deep as the ocean

'She offered to make me some fur lingerie from the ursur I killed.' Remi hums over his shoulder, his tone as casual as if he were listing things they might have for dinner. Glancing fully around, he bobs his eyebrows once, and then twice; did he accept? Does Remi have matching white-fur underwear for them? Will Ronin find out that night? Time will tell.

"I can't believe it either. Honestly, it was either this way, or that way. You had a 50/50 chance of being right." The alchemist replies, widening his eyes a fraction and then smirking.

There are two reasons that Remi has elected to come to the Collegium, one of which absolutely requires the Star's presence for reasons Ronin will shortly learn for himself. "Did you spend much time in the library, in Northaven?" He asks, glancing at one of the signs on a nearby bookshelf before abruptly setting off again.

THE LULLABY

& i guess i didn't mind  d r o w n i n g  in him.

I shouldn't laugh, but I know I'm a failure in your eyes

Ronin is about to ask that very question - did you accept? - when Remi makes it much more interesting to wonder, and he looks the other man up and down as if trying to imagine whether he's wearing them already. And if he is wearing them already, does that mean his butt is going to get too warm? Will he need to take off his clothes in the middle of the Collegium? The glint in blue eyes suggests that he very much hopes so.

"I would have almost definitely gone for that way, so I'm glad you were here to correct me," he continues, giving his husband's hand a gentle squeeze and hurrying along after him. He's not watching their surroundings at all now, naturally - Remi introduced the subject of fur lingerie, so he surely can't expect him to concentrate from here.

"Mm...? I did, actually," he says with a laugh, shaking his head; it's a bitter thing for him to remember, rather than nostalgic. "It was back when Loren and I were friends. And as I climbed the ranks of the Storm Guard, I needed the quiet space to work more than ever."

RONIN

he had eyes like rain & hair like waves
& a soul as vast and deep as the ocean

It's a rollercoaster, the way Remi is inclined to beam at his husband before it feels as though ice has been shoved into his stomach. Imagining a younger Ronin in the library, pouring over various pages and stumbling around to find what he was looking for was near enough to make Remi's heart ache with affection. So hearing Loren's name follow it has the alchemist biting at the inside of his cheek, and his fingertips stiffening slightly in Ronin's grip.

"We were probably often there at the same time, then." He murmurs, the joy having mostly fallen out of his voice no matter how much he tries to tell himself that he isn't bothered by thoughts of the Launceleyn anymore. But he is. So instead of swallowing down more of his hurt, Remi just rolls his eyes. "Too bad he had to go and ruin all the nice times, mm?"

After much winding through shelves and aisles (and backtracking at one point or another), Remi finally finds what he's been looking for. Holding it out for Ronin to see, the cover is an incredibly poor reproduction of the Skyport, with large cartoon-ish letters superimposed above the clouds reading: Build Your Own Sky Boat.

THE LULLABY

& i guess i didn't mind  d r o w n i n g  in him.

I shouldn't laugh, but I know I'm a failure in your eyes

"Mm, we probably were," Ronin agrees with a gentle smile, and as Remi's fingers stiffen in his own, he brings their hands up that he might press a warm kiss to the alchemist's knuckles. "It is a shame, yes. But we can make our own nice times with friends that aren't so fair-weather, right?" he suggests. "Or we can just go home and I'll wrap us up in blankets until we feel like creeping out again." Ronin doesn't mind either way - it's all spending time with his husband.

But they press onwards, and even though Ronin swears he's seen the same shelf more than twice on their trip through the stacks, he daren't say a word about it. It's a scenic route, that's what he thinks Remi will say if he pipes up, and so he merely walks, enjoying the feel of the alchemist's warm and calloused hand in his own, imagining how his ass looks clad in white Ursur fur.

So distracted is the Star that when Remi finally does hold out the book for him, it takes a couple of moments for him to actually translate the title. "Huh?" he says elegantly. "Do you want to build a skyboat, Remi?" The smile that threatens to creep across his face hopes the answer is yes.

RONIN

he had eyes like rain & hair like waves
& a soul as vast and deep as the ocean

Half closing one eye before shaking his head at Ronin, Remi lets a warm smile part his lips. "Remember how you weren't going to try and always fix things?" He wonders softly. "A, yeah, fuck that guy, would have served just fine." Remi points out, nudging the toe of Ronin's boot with his own.

What Ronin doesn't know, is that the shelves tend to move around, not unlike the labyrinth and other such places. Sometimes you have to backtrack, in order to go forward, or at least that's what he'd say, if asked.

Lowering the book that Ronin might be able to see his wide and boyish smile, Remi raises his brows and nods his head subtly once. 'Yep.' It's almost all he can say for a few seconds, such is the ball of excitement that has lodged itself in his throat. When he does manage to speak, it's in a voice drenched with joy and a timid sort of optimism that he's almost reluctant to let himself feel. "I thought Mateo and I could work on it together."

THE LULLABY

& i guess i didn't mind  d r o w n i n g  in him.

I shouldn't laugh, but I know I'm a failure in your eyes

Ronin's lips part to argue, before he realises his husband has made a very valid point indeed, and he softens, cheeks colouring pink. "You're right," he murmurs, leaning in to let his lips brush across Remi's cheek; half apology, half gratitude for bringing it up. "Fuck that guy," he adds, squeezing his hand gently. Then Ronin lets it go - which, in fairness, he has no choice about, because the look on Remi's face is enough to steal his breath and have him grinning as well.

As broody as the Lullaby can get; as much as he might stand for death and shadows and all that is still and silent in the world at the dead of night, no one shows joy like Remi. Utterly charmed by the idea and the man who has come up with it, Ronin reaches out to stroke a finger along the cover of the book. "Gods, I love you," he whispers, the blush remaining on his cheeks for completely different reasons.

"I think it's a great idea. Do you know where you'll want to keep the project while it's in progress? We could ask around the Skyport to see if there's space for you to build."

RONIN

he had eyes like rain & hair like waves
& a soul as vast and deep as the ocean

Remi's lips twist as he tries to resist the smile that wants to overtake them, his dimples deepening on both cheeks for his efforts. He isn't embarrassed to show emotion, least of all around Ronin, so much as his hesitation is one rooted in the world they find themselves in. A war brewing, lives in the balance, tasks to complete—and here Remi was, thinking of building himself a boat. But if the Alchemist had learned one thing about himself since agreeing to life in Stormbreak with Ronin, it was that if he didn't take time to do things for himself, he utterly lose who he was in the things he was forced to do for everyone else.

'We'll start it in the shop, but once it needs to be assembled, we will need somewhere else, though...' Remi grins sheepishly and perhaps a touch wickedly. "There is a reason that this book is the only one I am taking today. It is the only book, and not a particularly good one from what I have been told. But...the captains do not like to share their secrets." So they'd likely not want to share their docks, either.

By degrees Remi's expression shifts from tangible excitement to something much more even and jewel-toned in colour. "There was one other thing I needed from here if you'll indulge me a little longer?"

THE LULLABY

& i guess i didn't mind  d r o w n i n g  in him.

I shouldn't laugh, but I know I'm a failure in your eyes

"In the shop?" Far from worried about this, Ronin is already imagining Mateo and Remi hard at work, tinkering with the designs and making small models of the would-be-ship, and it warms his chest in a way that nothing else will ever manage to do. The Star nods, eyes widening a fraction as his husband reveals the story around this particular book. "Oh, I see," he all but whispers, as if even getting the book out of the Collegium will need to be an act of secrecy.

Nudging the Lullaby, Ronin can't help the glitter of mischief in his eyes. "We'll have to sneak parts of your ship out of the shop to the assembly point in the dead of night, like criminals. I can't wait," he admits. And as Remi reins back his excitement, Ronin straightens up and offers his arm to the other man. "It would be my pleasure to indulge you," he says honestly. "Lead the way, please."

RONIN

he had eyes like rain & hair like waves
& a soul as vast and deep as the ocean

Remi nods, sternly, and yet manages to maintain an air of mischief. If he didn't think the books were likely tagged by some magical sorting system, he might well have stuffed it under his shirt (or in the back of his ursur-underwear, you still don't know). It was only the assumption that Finn was around somewhere that kept the alchemist from doing precisely this, not wanting to have to explain himself to his near-twin.

'It's going to require lots of naps, if we are going to be up all night." Remi agrees. "Conveniently one of us blends into the dark." And the other? Well, the other was a beacon, but they'd worry about that later.

Leaning down slightly to set the book at their feet, Remi tugs back on the arm offered to him with a small shake of his head. "Oh no," He whispers, remaining in place. "We're already here." So saying it's with a tension that the moment doesn't yet have that Remi reaches out to tug Ronin closer, reaching for him with slow but intentional fingers and positioning himself so that his back was against one of the bookshelves. With green eyes aglow with a youthfulness not often found there these days, the alchemist pulls Ronin closer still. "I have always wanted to be kissed in a library." He admits bashfully, his cheeks flushing pink and his stomach flopping nervously, even after so many years of marriage.

THE LULLABY

& i guess i didn't mind  d r o w n i n g  in him.

I shouldn't laugh, but I know I'm a failure in your eyes

"I have a feeling I will be caught napping in my office more than once, if that's the case. Er... again." Because Ronin has absolutely been caught napping in his office before (and worse, most likely - there's a reason there's so much space under his desk). Still, he can't help but grin at the idea that one of them can blend into the darkness, and as if on cue, the Star dazzles the mezzanine for a brief moment before he gets a hold of himself. "I will have to try to contain my excitement about this skyboat," he agrees.

Expecting the other man to lead them to another part of the Collegium, it's a bit of a surprise to feel a tug on his arm, to be walked back among the stacks and shelves. Already flushed, it doesn't take much for the mere proximity between them to invite all sorts of thoughts into Ronin's head, and one of his hands moves to steady itself against Remi's hips, even as he all but covers the other man with his body, blocking him from view of any onlookers (not that there will be any).

"Really?" He raises an eyebrow, and the smile that he tries to stifle is a very crooked one indeed. I thought this was a scholarly type place is what he wants to say - a school, or something. But he's absolutely not going to burst Remi's bubble for semantics, not when green eyes have him pinned in place and the alchemist is close enough to feel his heartbeat in his chest as well as on his finger.

Ronin makes a show of looking over his shoulder, like someone might be coming up the stairs at any moment, and suddenly the soft murmur of voices and the scratching of quills is palpable. "Are you sure you'll be able to stay quiet?" he teases, almost under his breath, before he's leaning in and closing the distance between them. There's no rush, at first; soft lips make the most of their explorations, parting to deepen the kiss as Ronin inches closer, his free hand steadying them against the stack of books next to his husband's ear.

RONIN