Hot Date

SAMUEL Sam woke up and headed to his shop with something close to hope in his heart. He had made a decision the night before to finally go ahead and do what he'd spoken about; ask Remi for a real date. He wasn't quite sure what a real date entailed, but it probably wasn't a failed grope in a cave. Now that he could feel things he thought perhaps Remi might want him back, that they could have a real go at something. He wasn't sure what a date entailed, but he set up the attic of his shop with flavourful tea, biscuits and sweets, then moved the two chairs there closer together. For an extra romantic touch, he dimmed the lanterns and closed the curtains for a soft, yellow light not dissimilar to candlelight. Once it was all ready, he tried to go to Remi's shop as quickly as possible, knowing if he stalled he'd lose confidence. With a nervous knock on the door of the alchemy store, he waited, clutching a dried flower from his home. It was hard to find fresh ones at this time in Deepfrost, and his decorations had been all he'd had to gather from. As soon as the door was opened he held the flower out, his hands shaking as he began the words he'd planned: "Hello Remi. I...I um. I want to ask you. To go on. Ah. ...A date. With me. Please. With no e-expectations. I just think you are handsome and we could...try." I'm starting to heal and find some faith I'm starting to feel what's out of place Don't need you to save me, I can't wait To fall, to fail and start again

Remi couldn't remember the last time he'd actually gone home to sleep. There didn't seem to be much point. He'd done exceptionally little to improve the quality of his home, and there was simply so much to do in his shop that it just seemed to make sense. And so, despite the fact that it was still a bit early, Remi had been up for a while already. Surprised to hear a knock on his door (especially given that it was rarely if ever locked), the alchemist furrowed his brows and rose from where he'd be quietly sketching out a new idea. Well. It wasn't actually, but that doesn't really matter just now. "Coming." He called cheerfully, hiding a yawn behind the back of his hand. Opening his door, Remi was not terribly surprised to see Sam standing there, though was surprised to see a flower thrust towards him. A brightly curious and sweet expression contorted the alchemist's face as Sam spoke. Knowing not a lot, but enough about his friend and neighbour to know that it was better to let him speak once he'd started, Remi silently reached forward for the flower, holding it gently as Sam spoke. — I just think you are handsome and we could...try. A multitude of responses flit through Remi's mind, the more negative ones largely resulting from his recent conversation with Jigano. Was he a hurt waiting to happen, for Sam? Were all of his good intentions merely misguided daggers waiting to slice those he cared about most? Through the muddle of it all, Remi smiled and ran a hand through his curls. In large part he truly didn't know at all how he felt about the bookmaker. Their encounter in the cave had sufficiently confused the beginning of their friendship and whatever more it may be, but wasn't it worth finding out? "I would love to Sam. When did you have in mind?" REMI I tried to tie my heart down, board up all the windows Oh but it's too late now, I let you get too close

SAMUEL There was a beat of silence after his question in which Sam saw his whole life flash before his eyes. Oh Gods, this had been a stupid idea. He worked next to Remi now, which meant if this went poorly, if he was rejected before they had even begun, he was going to be followed by his failure everywhere. It was going to be there when he was working, when he left for the day, when they inevitably met in the street and had to step around eachother-- Then Remi said yes. Not even just yes, but that he'd love to. Sam stared with an unguarded, shocked expression until the words processed. "You...you would? Oh that's...wonderful." He looked back to his own door. "Well, um...i-if you're free now, I have some tea and stuff for you. And...for me. Because." With a little smile on his lips, Sam glanced up at Remi as he told him this news, trying not to think about possible implications. "I can t-taste it now. I can taste everything." I'm starting to heal and find some faith I'm starting to feel what's out of place Don't need you to save me, I can't wait To fall, to fail and start again

Remi met Sam's shocked expression with one of quiet and boyish amusement. Had the bookmaker thought that the alchemist would say no? A bemused smile tugged on his lips as he reiterated his acceptance with a gentle nod. Then Remi's lips formed a silent O of surprise, his lashes fluttering slightly. Well...he wasn't really doing anything that couldn't wait anyways. "Now is perfect." He agreed with a charming smile, until— —And...for me. Unlike Jigano, Remi did not need any sort of breadcrumbs to lead him to what Sam's meaning was. Trying very hard to mask his surprise—he had thought Sam would take some time before deciding, Remi's surprise was real, despite knowing full-well how it was Sam came to possess this new ability. "Then if this flower turns out to smell bad, I suppose I will be able to blame you for that." Remi replied with an easy smile. "You will have to tell me all about it. ONe moment—" Dashing back into the shop, Remi took a silent and deep breath. Please let him be alright. It wasn't so much of a prayer, for while Remi did suspect that someone was probably listening, he didn't much think they cared one way or another. But he did. And Jigano had left him doubting almost every choice he'd ever made now. Grabbing the purple-covered book Sam had given him and some sticks of charcoal, Remi doused the fire and returned to his door, flower still in hand. Though the walk was simply a few steps, Remi smiled at the bookmaker and extended his hand for the ascended to take should he like. This was a date after all. REMI I tried to tie my heart down, board up all the windows Oh but it's too late now, I let you get too close

SAMUEL Remi seemed to take the news of his upgrade in stride, which both pleased and disappointed Sam. True, he wanted to be normal, to be unremarkable, but...he had hoped the news would garner some kind of congratulations. It had to be a surprise to Remi at least, right? "Oh! W-wonderful." Sam smiled and stepped towards his door when Remi...went back inside. He stared at the alchemy shop's window, wondering if he'd massively misunderstood how dates went. But soon enough Remi was back, holding the notebook Sam himself had made and some charcoal. Was he hoping to draw...? Sam supposed that was alright, actually found himself excited for it. He had never had the skill and it was like magic to watch another make an image appear. Eagerly, he took Remi's hand. With the upgrade it now felt different; he could feel the heat in Remi's skin and the roughness of his fingertips from the hard work. It was so much more, and he had to hold in a gasp at the sheer sensation of it all. It was indeed a short walk back to his shop - only a few steps. When they arrived he stepped in the door, let Remi in then turned the sign on the door to 'closed'. "It's...it's all upstairs. Where you helped me clear out the bats." He began to lead the other man to the bottom of the stairs, laughing when he reached them. "I-I think you terrified everyone else with that. It was funny afterwards, though." Despite his nerves he seemed to be talking well today; Sam tried to make the most of it and spoke while he took Remi up the stairs. "I...I took the time to make a little..um..haha. D-date place?" He informed Remi, then made a sweeping gesture at the set up in the attic, the light looking just how he wanted. Soft, sweet. "Th-there is different teas and I thought it might be nice to speak here." I'm starting to heal and find some faith I'm starting to feel what's out of place Don't need you to save me, I can't wait To fall, to fail and start again

In almost everything, Sam seemed to rush. Through his words, through his emotions, but if this...well. If this was meant to be a try, Remi wanted him to slow. And so, as his fingers found Sam's hand—still that too-precisely luke-warm, but at least with feeling—Remi gently laced fingers through the bookmakers, taking a moment before closing them all together and letting the tips brush softly against the top of Sam's hand. But as they neared the door and his hand was released in order to open, gesture, and turn the sign to close, Remi smiled to himself, then widened that smile for Sam. "It?" Remi quipped over his shoulder, a playful smile on his lips as he moved towards the familiar stares. "Oh, did I?" Remi asked, brows furrowing as he tried to recall why. But then of course, a lion bounding up and down might be a bit frightening. The attuned simply assumed that upon hearing the roar of a creature who did not belong in the upper floor of a shop, the rest of Sam's helpers would have just assumed what Remi was and gotten on with their tasks.  "Ahh, sorry Sam. Please, apologize to them if you —" Trailing off, Remi closed his eyes with a sigh. Jigano. Reckless. As he neared the top of the stairs and the intimate set-up was revealed, Remi offered his friend a crooked smile, one that dimpled his cheeks and caused his eyes to sparkle warmly. "It's lovely Sam. And yes, it will be nice to speak here. With you." Glancing at the tea, Remi gave the ascended a curious sort of half-smile, motioning to one of the chairs as if asking for permission. "You said the tea was for both of us? So then you.." For a moment the alchemist hesitated. That Sam had already taken the patch was perhaps one reason he could tell the man who it was who had created it. But, perhaps not quite so soon. Still Remi worried that Sam would think he'd only done it for his own selfishness, and given that Sam had said this date came without expectations, Remi did not want to complicate things so early by potentially adding some. REMI I tried to tie my heart down, board up all the windows Oh but it's too late now, I let you get too close

SAMUEL Not noticing the way Remi cut himself off, Sam waved a hand. "I'm sure there's no ap-apology needed. The only one I see normally is Jigano, anyway, and you can talk to him yo-yourself, right?" As far as Sam knew, Jigano and Remi were friends. True, Jigano seemed judgemental over the other man's choices, but Jigano seemed wise and Sam thought in a sense he deserved to be judging. The way Remi smiled as they reached the top of the stairs made his heart skip a metaphorical beat. Sam thought he could set up a hundred rooms a hundred ways just to see Remi smile at him like that again. Was this what dating was actually about? Not a terrifying series of trials with a potential to lead to yet more trials, but little moments where Remi smiled and he felt like laughing with sheer joy? Gently he took Remi's hand and holding it up, lead him to the chair; the motion was naturally silly since it was only two paces at most. Then he went to sit in his own chair, pulling it yet closer to Remi's when he decided he was too far apart. With an arm on the side he leaned into towards Remi, tucking his legs under him while he excitedly explained his new addition. "Well. I can en-enjoy it as much as you now. Isla has done a wonderful thing. She gave me a...I-I don't quite know what it was, but a band that let me feel. I can touch things and feel them, Remi. Taste. Smell. It is..." He took a moment to pause so he wouldn't get too emotional. "I don't...know h-how to repay her. It is the most beautiful gift. Even the p-pain is amazing." I'm starting to heal and find some faith I'm starting to feel what's out of place Don't need you to save me, I can't wait To fall, to fail and start again

"Of course I can." Remi answered smoothly, smiling bemusedly at Sam. Though honesty was ever on the alchemist's lips, he'd not taint the relationship Sam had with Jigano over...well, whatever falling out the two men had had. "He knows I can become a lion anyways." He added with an off-handed chuckle. With deep and rumbly sort of laugh, Remi allowed his hand to be taken despite the handful of steps between himself and the chair. If anything the gesture itself was what made him smile, but only because Sam did it so easily, as if the pair had been leading each other for years, rather than just down a terrifying cave, from one door to another, and now into a chair. As the man sat and leaned, Remi thought for a moment that perhaps he meant to lean in and— —but no, he was just settling himself. Releasing the breath he'd been inadvertently holding, he listened gently be very careful to not clench his jaw despite how he wanted to and the retelling. "The pain?" Remi repeated immediately and rather stupidly. He'd known there would be pain for the ascended of course. Still, he flinched hearing it. "Sam, can I ask you something?" Remi asked then, turning his now-somehow-broadened shoulders towards Sam. The alchemist's pale sea-glass green stare was contemplative but troubled as it washed over his friend's pale face and arresting blue eyes. "Why did you decide to use the band? Is it...what you thought? What you wanted?" REMI I tried to tie my heart down, board up all the windows Oh but it's too late now, I let you get too close

SAMUEL Remi seemed worried about the pain. Sam placed a hand on the arm of the other man's chair, just an inch away from his arm and smiled gently. "It's al-alright. It's not anymore than normal people have. ...I don't think so, anyway." He supposed he had nothing to compare against, not anymore, but everyone hurt when they fell or hit themselves, right? "Of course. A-ask me anything. That is what we are doing, right?" The idea of having someone so close they could say anything was a wild and strange one to Sam, but he wanted to foster that kind of relationship as much as he could. When he actually heard the question a wide smile appeared on his face with a nod. "It...it wasn't much of a decision. Isla sent me a letter...or at least. Hm." He paused the story to think and pour the first of the tea, a sweet mix of berries that was a symphony of wonderful scents. Pushing a teacup towards Remi and pulling one to himself, he started again: "She said she di-didn't send the letter. But anyway, she had the band for me. When I knew w-what it could do...I had to, Remi." He spoke earnestly, leaning in between their two chairs with his tea clasped under his chin. "It does all I have ev-ever wanted. I can taste, and touch, and smell." As if to illustrate this point he breathed in his tea exaggeratedly, with a smile and closed eyes. "An-and to feel pain when I fall just like anyone else...it is wonderful. I am just the same as you now except for the blood. And..w-well." Sam laughed. "I suppose you can turn into a li-lion. She hasn't made a band for that yet." I'm starting to heal and find some faith I'm starting to feel what's out of place Don't need you to save me, I can't wait To fall, to fail and start again

Remi's eyes dropped to Sam's fingertips against the material of the chair, noting that while he hadn't hesitated to take Remi's hand, still he seemed hesitant now. Smiling, the alchemist's teeth tugged gently on his lower lip as he nodded. What normal people had. Remi couldn't help the way the back of his teeth found one another in a silent clench hearing that Sam thought Isla was the sender. In the back of his mind Remi could already hearing Jigano condemning him for eschewing the blame and deferring it to Isla instead. Picking up the teacup gently—despite the tension in his arms that made him very much want to shatter something—Remi breathed in the berry-scents and sighed gently. I had to, Remi. No you didn't, Remi wanted to plead. Perhaps it was just Sam's way of phrasing it, but all Remi wanted to hear from his friend just then was that it had been a choice. Not something he felt compelled to do. However the smile that washed over his face as he breathed in the tea was like the lifting of a weight or a veil from the alchemist, and absurd as it was, Remi felt the prickling of tears against the back of his eyes. "Sam.." He whispered, but he had no words to express how he felt. The mention of Isla and lions suitably broke the tension however. Laughing cheerfully, Remi took a small sip of his tea and quirked a brow at Sam. "Well, there are ways for you to turn into a lion as well." He said far too easily, forgetting the implications. With a blush, he cast a boyish glance towards Sam before averting his eyes back to his tea. "Sam.." He started again, taking a breath and holding it as he contemplated the ripples of his tea. Exhaling gently, he looked solemnly towards the bookmaker. "Isla did not write you that letter. Nor make you that band." He said, voice slow and low, eyes wary, hopeful, adoring. "I did." Voice now a whisper. An admission. A death sentence. REMI I tried to tie my heart down, board up all the windows Oh but it's too late now, I let you get too close

SAMUEL Sam was so excited to impart the tale of his upgrade that he took Remi's silence to be rapt attention, unaware of the conflict going on inside him. "I suppose...there are, b-but.." I shouldn't bite you on on the first date, he thought, but didn't say. Sam had almost forgotten that he had gained Remi's attuned powers from the bite. He had been so focused for the last weeks on the thing that had happened before his hawk transformation it had somehow become the least important part of the story. What Remi said next made him pause mid-tea sip, the cup held almost comically up to his lips for a long time as his eyes flicked up to stare. Isla had seemed uncomfortable with taking the credit and Remi rarely lied, so it seemed like this was the truth. A final answer to the identity of his benefactor was very satisfactory. Sam smiled as he placed the cup back down, reaching forward to clasp Remi's free hand. "Really? Y-you did?! Remi, that's amazing. Oh...I don't...I don't...kn-know how to say thank you properly. Thank you. Th-thank you. I can say it a hundred times." He almost surged forward to kiss Remi's fingers, but just about resisted, squeezing his hand instead. "Why did you...? Do you c-care so for me? I have never...no one has ever been so k-kind to me. Why didn't you tell me it was y-you?" I'm starting to heal and find some faith I'm starting to feel what's out of place Don't need you to save me, I can't wait To fall, to fail and start again

Remi nodded attentively as Sam trailed off. But. In the moments before his friend started to speak again the alchemist tried not to fixate on the unfathomable pleasure Sam's teeth had caused, the surge of indescribable want. Even now words escaped his mind to try and in any way justify the ascended biting him again, and yet...like any good addict, he thought that perhaps he could justify just a little bit more. It would feel so good for both of them, and, and, and.. Finding his hand suddenly in Sam's, Remi blinked a bit bewildered, fully expecting a near-interrogation level of questioning. Desperately he wanted to believe that his friend knew what he was doing—(was this what Jigano thought of him..?)—and yet his enthusiasm and eagerness made Remi think that he had not thought through the ramifications at all. "Yes." Remi said gently, returning the squeeze against his hand. "Of course I do Sam. You were so upset that day in the cave, and not only because..." Remi blinked and looked down uncertainly with a half-smile as if to reassure himself. "...because of what happened—" (or didn't) "..and again when I came to see you at your house." Conjuring another feather in his free hand, Remi gently turned Sam's hand over, unlacing it from his own. Intentionally and with great slowness, Remi began to trace errant patterns against the ascended's palm with the spine of the feather, not pausing his movements but allowing his eyes to flicker up to Sam's face every so often. "I...I did not want you to think I only created the patch because of what happened." Looking up in earnest now, green eyes searching blue, Remi tried to smile but worry tugged down at the corners of his lips. "I promise you it was not because of that. I just wanted you to be happy, Sam." REMI I tried to tie my heart down, board up all the windows Oh but it's too late now, I let you get too close

SAMUEL Of course I do, Sam. His long-useless heart jumped in his chest at the words, the prick of tears coming to the back of his eyes and having to be forcibly blinked down. Remi cared for him. What had he done to deserve such a thing? It was unthinkable. Every time he heard something like that the noose of his parent's words loosened just a notch, the worthless and pathetic labels peeled off another inch. The feathers touch was gentle, slow, but each pass of it against his newly sensitive skin was like an explosion. His fingers relaxed, surrendering himself to Remi as he nervously smiled and looked back into his eyes. They were beautiful, he thought, something he had noticed before but never had the peace to think about. "And I am ha-happy, Remi. So happy. No...no matter what your m-motivations were. It is still the best thing anyone has ever..." Sam took a moment to collect himself, a mute mimicry of a shaking breath as he stopped himself from becoming too emotional. "I know you. You wou-wouldn't make me do anything I didn't want to, right?" With a soft, hopeful smile he moved his other hand to brush just lightly on Remi's wrist, still letting him trace with the feather. "...I...I think we've b-both been hurt. So I think you...un-understand me. Which is why you helped. So I know you won't..won't hurt me." I'm starting to heal and find some faith I'm starting to feel what's out of place Don't need you to save me, I can't wait To fall, to fail and start again

Glancing up through a curtain of his curls, Remi scanned Sam's face trying to peer through the muted expression and softly stuttered words to whatever was beneath. You wou-wouldn't make me do anything I didn't want to, right? The alchemist's expression crumpled slightly. He knew that the question was warranted, that Sam was likely just checking, just reassuring himself, but on the heels of all that Jigano had said, the questioning of his morals and his motives was like a dagger against freshly wounded flesh. "Never." He whispered, trying on a smile but finding it too difficult to hold. Watching as Sam's fingers brushed against his wrist, Remi tilted his head to the side as if just as amazed as the ascended was by the sensation. With fingers that trembled ever so slightly, they extended to become feathers in their own right, his hand and wrist now a strange assortment of flesh and feathers; his fingers strong flight feathers, while the softer blonde-ones on his wrist down and countour feathers that were silky-soft to the touch. "Never intentionally." Remi said, hazarding another glance upwards. But in the back of his mind, he could hear Jigano's condemnations of all that he was. He might not intentionally hurt Sam, but what of his recklessness? What of all the ways in which his actions could hurt the man, that he hadn't thought of simply because he was too naive? Too...Remi? "Do you want to know a secret, Sam?" Remi asked, a boyish smile on his lips as he glanced upwards, the sides of his mouth crinkling slightly with his expression as his eyes danced with amusement. "I have never been on a date before. Not with a man anyways." He added, a breathy chuckle escaping his lips. With Loren their meetings had been strictly work, until they hadn't been. But then it had been all demands that Remi prove his affections for the Launceleyn followed by stolen passion. Perhaps his time with Ianto thinking of stars and tea-shops might have been like a date, but it had always been under the influence of some substance or another, and never had it been planned. To be sure he'd taken women on several dates, when he was still trying to hide his inclinations from the world, but that hardly counted. For whatever experience Sam seemed to think Remi possessed, there were still plenty of firsts for him too. REMI I tried to tie my heart down, board up all the windows Oh but it's too late now, I let you get too close