From being an Abandoned who had rarely left the Hollowed Grounds, to embracing the call of adventure, to dying and being reborn first as an Ascended and then as an Ancient, Maea has gone through quite the amount of changes in her life. One thing remains common, though, in her attempts to find out just where she belongs; she’s always had a craving for knowledge which has brought her to so many places and to meet so many people here in Caido. We can’t wait to see what else is in store for her!
Congratulations, Maea!
Credits
Court of the Fallen was created in October of 2018 by Odd, Honey, and Crooked.
Skinning and hosting by the epically talented Kaons, and functionality fanciness by the coding magic of Neowulf. If you ever see either of them around, make sure to show them some love!
They had fallen asleep, completely wrapped up in one another without a care in the world, and if Ronin could have kept that snapshot to take with him until he awakened, he would have done so happily. Alas, his subconscious is stormier than he would like to admit, and so they sit, in their dreams, in a stark field of deep green grass. The sky overhead is black, as is the rain which falls to stain their skin. Even like this, though, Ronin is positioned comfortably with Remi, laying with his head in the other man's lap.
"How will this go, then?" he asks softly. There is no anger now that's directed at his husband, merely a sad realisation that their lives are about to imminently change, no matter how careful Remi is. "Will they be coming here to Stormbreak, to visit? Or will you just be going to Halo?"
right now everything you want is wrong & right now all your dreams are waking up
There are rainclouds far in the distance, but without taking his attention away from Ronin, Remi has no way of knowing whose lingering emotions have caused them. Interested only in the man whose hair his fingers part and comb through, Remi narrows his eyes thoughtfully as if to better see the answers. "I am not sure. Hotaru cannot come here. It is possible that the baby will not be able to either." Ronin and his ring would be able to indicate immediately if the baby was an abandoned or accepted.
"I would like them to come here if possible, if only to see where we live and such, but.." Remi isn't quite sure how to say, but there's a war on and so I don't know if that is even realistic. Instead, he just shrugs, pulsing the equivalent of an emotional black-hole against Ronin. "Really, I do not know. I do not want to be an absent father, but..I also do not want to be there." He admits, and though the two of them are safely locked away in a dream, Remi whispers the words just the same.
The Lullaby
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
The thunder that purrs in the rainclouds overhead sounds almost like mad laughter, but it's the only indication of Ronin's opinion about Hotaru being unable to get to Stormbreak. Never has he thought himself to be the type to relish being able to shut other people out, but in these past few days, he's discovering unsavoury things about himself every other minute, it feels like.
"Mm..." His response is perhaps even more unhelpful at the thought of the baby coming to Stormbreak, should it be possible. A fat raindrop lands against his collarbone, black as ink, drawing a line down the side of his neck where it rolls. "I wish I could say I was looking forward to it," he whispers, closing his eyes as if that would make a difference - it doesn't.
"If I hadn't failed with Safrin, my projection would be able to go further. Maybe then you could be both there and here," he mutters, though it doesn't really help.
right now everything you want is wrong & right now all your dreams are waking up
The alchemist ignores the dark laughter that seems to spring overhead, focusing only on the blue of Ronin's eyes and nothing else. His fingers work methodically through the Star's hair, lowering only to apply pressure to his temples before working back up again. "I know." Remi comments quietly, and though his fingers itch to wipe away the charcoal-stained drop on Ronin's chest, he keeps his hands where they are.
"How do you mean?" It's asked almost conversationally, as Remi furrows his brows slightly. It occurs to him then, that with Ronin's feelings as they were, now would likely be one of the best opportunities they would have for Ronin to hit Remi with his supernova in a way that would hurt him, rather than heal. Remi would deserve it of course, but that would also mean prying himself away from Ronin, and he wasn't quite ready for that. It also occurs to him that...were it possible for Ronin to retrace his steps and complete the quest the way Safrin had intended, the possibility might still be available to him. To them. Though Remi would never be the one to suggest it.
The Lullaby
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
He knows. Ronin wishes Remi didn't have to know, and his apology goes unsaid in the way a brief ray of sunshine fills the field with warmth and light, before the clouds overtake everything once more. Closing his eyes, it's with a low hum of appreciation that Ronin accepts the touches, and he reaches up to gently capture one of Remi's hands that he might press a kiss against the inside of his wrist. "I wish I could feel differently," he mumbles.
Eyes flickering back open, he focuses on his husband and lets out a sigh. "She gave me those flowers, if you remember. But she said the point was for me to control my emotions, to stop myself from giving in. And I didn't do that with all of them... If I had, I would be able to project further, I think." He shrugs his shoulders. "Then again, Safrin also said it was good to give in sometimes, so..." That didn't make much sense.
"Granted, that was the day I refused her and she took all of my abilities away, so it probably wasn't the best time to do something like that."
right now everything you want is wrong & right now all your dreams are waking up
'You would not be the man I love so fiercely if you did." Ronin had always been more than his prince-like qualities. More than what made him heroic and noble and good. He was his flaws too, and gods if Remi didn't love every fracture in the Star from which his light was able to shine.
"Ah, Right." Remi doesn't hide the way that the clenching of his teeth causes thumber to rumble over head. "If I remember, she did not ask you to give in with anyone but her." It was ever Safrin's way. There are questions that ball up in the back of his throat, but Remi just exhales them in a steady stream of white fog. 'You cannot say no to her again.' He decides at last. "We are so close to everything going wrong...and..." Even here, in their dreams, Remi isn't sure that Safrin can't hear them. "...it would not surprise me if Safrin let everything fall to ruin, just to punish you again."
Did Remi think Safrin was so possessive of Ronin that she would let them lose the war, just to prove a point?
He absolutely did.
The Lullaby
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
"No you," Ronin whispers with playful petulance, smiling another kiss against Remi's wrist before releasing him, relaxing fully once more in his lap. "I do love you fiercely, though. I hope you know that. I love you through this, and through anything else the world throws at us." And though the rainclouds don't part, the environment doesn't seem remotely hostile.
"Mm... I know. I already promised her as much, when she returned my abilities," he admits, and though his vow was true then, it was even more so now. "I have no intention of giving her any reason to punish me either. But I can see about restarting that quest, if it means it will be helpful for you."
Letting out a sigh that's as tired as it is bitter, he finally asks the question he's been dancing around for days. "So how are Hotaru and the baby?"
right now everything you want is wrong & right now all your dreams are waking up
"I love when you do that." Remi whispers, of the lips against his wrist. It was a gesture often offered by the Star, but the alchemist wasn't sure he'd ever told the other man just how sweet he found it. Sighing and feeling the landscape and its subtle shifts more than he sees them, Remi nods. "That makes it so much better, and so much worse, you know." He says, of Ronin loving him through all this madness.
Biting the inside of his lip, Remi presses his eyes closed hard enough that red roses bloom behind them. "I don't know. I am not sure you could attack me with both of them in such a way that I would gain that ability from you. And—" Because there's absolutely no hiding it. "—it makes me sick to think about you being with her, if that is what it takes." That the last time Safrin and Ronin were together, she'd blotted out Remi from his thoughts altogether was one of the few things that could rile Remi instantly to the point of absurd recklessness.
Forcing himself to breathe away the thoughts that needled him, he opens his eyes, not as bothered by the question as Ronin was. "Fine. She...had some sort of plot planned. She is going to Frey to see if they might keep the baby safe." He shrugs. "Apparently..all of her children in the past have been twins." Remi adds, pointedly not looking at Ronin's face so that the Star might be allowed to feel his feelings about this on his own.
The Lullaby
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
"Yeah?" Ronin smiles sweetly, the Lullaby's words having exactly the desired effect; even the admission about how difficult and easy his love was making this can't wipe it away. "I know it does," he says, and although his tone is soft and loving, there's a small part of him that can't help but think that his love is the perfect sort of punishment for something like this, in that case.
Tilting his head, he isn't sure he understands the other man. "I already attacked you with my projection," he says slowly. "Surely I would just need to do it again, once mine can go farther?" Of the alchemist's second point, though, Ronin can only glance away and shrug his shoulders. It's a complicated knot of emotion that has thunder growling overhead again. "She could ask at any time," he points out. It wouldn't have to be for a quest.
Oh, but then twins happens, and the rain that falls overhead is black and thick as oil, making the Star's eyes seem all the more steely for its darkness. "Of course they do," he whispers. Which is better than saying Oh good, a spare.
right now everything you want is wrong & right now all your dreams are waking up
It's subtle, the way Remi's nose crinkles and how his head turns just a fraction to the side. Though his grin is one-sided, it lights up his entire face and despite the storm brewing overhead, the alchemist is hopelessly radiant with love for the Star.
"SuReLy." Remi repeats, offering Ronin a skeptical look that suggests the Star should know better. "I am not sure it works like that. You...I worry that going farther is a different sort of ability. Just like being able to switch places with yourself." Unable to see how the magic is laid out on their profiles, Remi isn't sure how to characterize what counts and what doesn't.
It hits him harder than he might have expected, even though he knows it to be true. Looking up into the sky, Remi stays his emotions from destroying everything that rises and grows around them. Anytime. And not for a quest. Remi feels cold in a way that burns. His fingertips still in Ronin's hair lest claws appear and give the Star a haircut. 'If it does...I do not know if I want to know." He admits tersely. "I know you will do what you must. I know it does not change things with us, but..I am not sure I can take knowing."
The Lullaby
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
"SuReLy," Ronin repeats right back to his husband, even now that black rain dots his face in a grotesque array of freckles. Humming his agreement, though he's only really thought about it on a surface level, he supposes he understands enough to be able to nod to Remi. "I guess you have a point," he concedes. "It would be good if I could project and teleport to further places though, wouldn't it," he admits.
As the hand stills in his hair and lightning chases thunder across the sky overhead, Ronin can understand precisely the sort of nerve he might have touched. Reaching up to rest his hand over Remi's, he seeks out the alchemist's green gaze. "Then you won't know," he says softly, "not unless you ask me. I can keep it to myself, but I won't lie to your face if you ask." His thumb brushes over the back of his hand. "Okay?"
right now everything you want is wrong & right now all your dreams are waking up
"Mmm..hmm.." Remi agrees stiffly. It would be useful of course, but if Ronin was asking if it was worth fucking a goddess over, then no, Remi would have to disagree. But that wasn't what was being asked, nor was it his choice. Nor was this a helpful reaction to be having. He knew that too, but—
"—I hate her so much." Remi says softly, through clenched teeth and eyelashes stained black with the same ash-filled rain. "But okay." He adds, trying to sound more level-headed than he felt. "I know this is not about me, I know I—" Lashes fluttering Remi shakes his head at himself as he looks up into the clouds. "—I know I still have so much to make up for, but.." Looking back down at Ronin, and seeing only Safrin's lips leaving comet trails across his skin, the alchemist closes his eyes.
"Twins. Yes." He mumbles, having not answered this before. Talking about his own stupidity was better than speaking of Safrin.
The Lullaby
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
"I know you do," Ronin whispers, shifting so he might be able to sit up and pull the other man into his lap instead. "I know," he repeats, echoing his counterpart and leaning in to kiss away the tension that runs through him, impossible as that might be. "Just because you messed up, it doesn't mean that you aren't allowed to feel things too. We've both been there," he murmurs against his lips, drawing back enough to offer a smile that's equal parts sad and adoring.
And it falls away again at the confirmation about the twins, Ronin scrunching his nose and shrugging. "It doesn't mean that this child will be one of twins," he mutters. "What happened to all her others, I wonder?" He can hazard a guess, but he isn't sure if it would make him feel better or worse.
right now everything you want is wrong & right now all your dreams are waking up
'Stop being so perfect.' Remi grumbles against Ronin's chest, ignoring the black water that coats his face as he buries himself relentlessly against the Star. Stretching a hand under Ronin's shirt if only to properly feel the warmth from his husband, the alchemist lets himself linger where he can both feel and hear Ronin's heartbeat. He lets it flood through him, pounding away his hate-filled thoughts until there's just a dull emptiness that's far easier to endure.
Pulling back, Remi reaches forward to brush away a smear of black from under the Star's eye. "Left in other worlds. Dead." He shrugs. "I did not ask. The world she came from was...it sounds as though her gods were as difficult as these ones are." It was no justification or explanation really, not that Remi had one to offer.
"I..bumped into Nate the other day." Literally. "I think...no, I know." Remi corrects the way he wants to downplay things, even as he speaks. "I was going to kill him. Right there in the street." With eyes soft and an expression that seemed utterly at odds with what he was saying for how gentle it was, Remi shakes his head. "I think...I still might."
The Lullaby
Speaks with a thick Italian accent.
Force and magic can be used against Remi without permission.
