Shoot the Messenger

Sam ran. The darkness was all around, enveloping and choking him. The only thing more intense was the cold which had invaded his body, making his gait awkward and unsteady. He fell to the ground several times in his terror and shakiness and got more than a few clear cuts and mud-marks, but he got up quickly each time. He had to make it back to the temple. He had to. Finally, blissfully, he saw the doors before him and fell onto them. His fists pounded on the door, Sam not even considering that Remi may have moved since the last time he was there. "REMI! R-REMI!" He yelled through the crack in the door, feeling that if he wasted any time something would come crawling up behind him and drag him away into the night. "IT'S SAMUEL! P-PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR!" Remi's insistence on opening the door to Ronin would now work in his favour, hopefully. He had criticised the man's bleeding heart before but now he counted on it. Samuel This time I might just disappear

I'll stay here with you until this dream is gone

The alchemist had cleaned up the rose petals, disposed of the blankets (some of which were perhaps a bit too stained now to warrant bothering to clean. He'd gone to check on the infirmary, seeing that Isla was gone. Every now and then he'd glance at the stone in his pocket, reassured by the soft green glow. Perhaps she'd been called away, but surely everything was well, and the patients within appeared to be doing just fine without her.

But there was Sam's note to think about. Sam, who didn't have a stone to communicate over long distances. Sam who said he had soSmething important to do, which apparently hadn't required waking Remi. Sam who said he had gone outside.

Just as he was about to go back down to the Rathskeller to check and see if the bookmaker was there, Sam's frantic banging on the main doors caught his attention. Without hesitation, just as he hadn't with Ronin, Remi ran towards the sound. The earth he'd packed beneath the seal of the door was swept away with a simple flick of his wrist, and quickly Remi went about opening the locks, unbolting some with his fingers and using his magic for others. "Sam I am here!" Remi called breathless with worry now.

As the locks finally were released, Remi pulled the doors open, reaching out immediately to grab at Sam and haul him inside, slamming the doors firmly behind him.

Adrenaline course through his body as he whirled on the ascended, frightened eyes scanning him over to see if he appeared wounded. "Sam..." Remi mumbled, seeing nothing that looked immediately problematic, though given that Sam didn't bleed, that wasn't always so easy to tell. "Where did you go?"

He nearly cried with relief when he heard Remi's voice and then the door swung open, Sam letting himself be pulled in and collapsing onto Remi's chest. His hands shook violently along with the rest of his body and his legs proved themselves unstable; on the floor with fluid from his scarred hands staining the stones wet, he looked up and tried to formulate what he'd just seen into words. "Th-there was a Luxere a-a-and I we-went and..." Flashes of Isla's death came to him, blocking his throat as if there were a worm inside him as well, the way he'd seen her mouth expand to inhuman size as it forced it's way in; he took a moment to panic and hit the floor just to get out some nervous energy before he continued. "Isla. I-Isla was there. And...and some o-other people. There was a h-h-hur-hurt one. Isla went to it and...she...Remi...she..." Sam turned to look up into Remi's eyes, knowing it had to be clear he was telling the truth here. He wouldn't be able to say it twice. "The mon-monster went into h...her and...she's...she's dead." Samuel This time I might just disappear

I'll stay here with you until this dream is gone

As Sam dropped, Remi lowered himself with him. Where's Sam's hands shook, Remi's were confident and gentle. "Sam, wh—" He began, pale eyes alighting on the wetness of Sam's palms which sent a cold shiver through his entire body.

But it was nothing compared to what Sam had to say.

As he mentioned Isla's name, Remi immediately fished around in his pocket for the stone. It still glowed green. And if glowed green it meant she was okay.

It meant she was okay.

Remi clung to that hope despite the shake in Sam's voice and body. He wanted to look away from those pale eyes as they rose to meet his. Wanted to hold up the stone to prove that the words he knew were coming couldn't be so.

She couldn't be—

—she's...she's dead.

"Where is she now." Remi asked in a low voice. An all too calm voice. The alchemist's normally smiling-face was like marble, impassive, unresponsive.

Remi's question set alight the panic in Sam's chest all over again. It implied Remi thought he could go and save her, that he had any power to reverse what Sam had seen. He didn't, but Sam knew Remi would try anyway unless he properly convinced him to not try it. And perhaps he would have to bend the truth just a little to convince him. "I d-don't know, but she's dead, Remi. Ac-actually dead. A monster...we-went into her mou...mouth and..." Sam felt his stomach revolt at the memory, try to send back out the few scraps of food he'd eaten. He swallowed hard and touched his throat. "..It...it c-came out of her st-stomach and...ate her..." This was where he had to change the story just a little, to stop Remi from running out after the phantom of Isla. "Then...th-then...another one came and...ate her en-entirely. And ran a-away. So she's...g-gone. You can't..I'm s-sorry." Hoping that would be enough to stop him from immediately bolting out the door Sam grabbed at Remi's shirt and leaned into him, letting the despair he'd been hold off rush over him. Samuel This time I might just disappear

I'll stay here with you until this dream is gone

Remi's jaw clenched at the description. His entire body had turned cold, a buzzing echoing loudly in his ears. It was distracting. He wanted to swat at it, but his tunnel-vision kept his focus directly on Sam.

Sam who was not answering his questions.

Until he did.

..ate her en-entirely.

"It.." Remi inhaled for what felt like the first time in years. "So there....there is nothing left.." His words hit the ground like stone. The comfort Sam tried to seek from the alchemist did not come. Even as the bookmaker clung to his shirt, pawing into him, Remi was like some immovable and emotionless thing, his eyes staring blankly ahead.

But the stone was green.

It was green.

"..she..."

The words wouldn't come. The stone was green. But he knew Sam wouldn't lie. The terror was writ cleanly on him, his hands wounded, his shaking real.

The breathes that Remi had been holding suddenly came en masse. His heart remembered it was meant to beat and suddenly thundered, the rush of blood and oxygen nearly enough to make him pass out. Dizziness swirled around him, and he gripped onto Sam—Sam who had been out there as well. Sam shaking against him. Distractedly he wrapped a hand, and then two, around the bookmaker. Leaning back onto his feet, relaxing into a posture of defeat, his eyes fluttered but did not see. His lips trembled, but no tears came.

He just...he couldn't believe it was true. Isla had been one of his very best friends. They'd fallen in together so easily. She'd always been a permanent fixture in his imaginings of the future. His heart just couldn't believe it.

"Sam, your ... your hands.." Remi muttered stupidly, the hands around Sam's back trying to coax him to sit up so that Remi could look at his palms.

To his surprise, Remi seemed to believe his words on face value. Sam thought that perhaps the danger was passed for now; his chest still screamed for the horror he'd seen and the loss of Isla, but at least he wouldn't have to watch Remi run out there; then he heard 'so there's nothing left'. Oh no. There was a good chance, from what he'd seen, that Isla's body would be gone by the time they got out there. But it would also be just his luck that his lie would be easily revealed by Remi finding her body sometime later. He had never been a gifted liar and rather than gracefully fix his error he began to babble. "W-well, I don't know...I r-ran away when I s-saw the second...m-monster and....she might be...or...a p-part of her m...might be out there but she's dead, Remi. It c-could have spat her o-out or something but I sa...I saw her die." Hopefully that was enough to give him plausible deniability if Isla's body showed up later. He let his hands be taken. The wounds did hurt, two big tears in his hands from multiple falls and fragile, cold skin. But they would heal quickly enough, along with the scrapes on the rest of his body. At least his shaking was beginning to calm, just a soft vibration in Remi's hands. "...I...I'll be alright." Samuel This time I might just disappear

I'll stay here with you until this dream is gone

Remi stiffened. "But you said you saw the monster eat her entirely and run away?" It wasn't an accusation. It was hope. "If her body is out there...I have to go..."

Looking down at Sam's hands, the alchemist winced. Honestly they didn't look too bad, but that was only because normally they should have been covered in blood, not clear fluid. The lack of red was misleading, but still it looked painful. "Oh Sam." He said with a shuddered breath. "Why did you go alone? Why did you not wake me?" The look in his eyes hardened for a moment. A look that said, if you had, maybe I could have saved her.

"...I...I d-don't know. It all was so quick...I'm..." It was true that he was confused about the exact order of events. His mind was so addled by panic and fear that the moment of Isla's death was already becoming foggy and hard to remember exactly. There were images that flashed before him - Isla with her mouth stretched around the worm, the splash of gore that had been her stomach - but the real time happenings were becoming lost. Remi seemed for a moment sympathetic and Sam revelled in being looked after as he looked over his hands, flexing his fingers just slightly and watching as more fluid gushed from the wound. He would need to go to The Voice soon, he knew. ".....The...the Luxere we saw...all of us. We j-just...saw it and had to f-f-follow. Isla too. All of us. I just...ha-had to go. I don't know. It's...h-hard to explain." He shook his head, confused himself about why he had ventured outside without Remi. Samuel This time I might just disappear

I'll stay here with you until this dream is gone

"Sam." Remi said sternly now, far more stern than he meant. "Is she still out there? Her body?" The way his body had sunk down onto his folded legs now rose slightly, muscles coiling and ready for action. Already his mind had leaped ahead. He couldn't ask Vai to come, not when she was now their only healer. Ronin would have to stay with Aoife. He'd have Sam tell Vai where he went, and if he flew fast enough and high enough, surely he'd be safe. They hadn't seen anything in the skies yet, after all.

Focusing on Sam now, Remi tilted his head slightly. "What is hard to explain?" He asked, unsure if this was relevant to Isla's death, or if it was just Sam unable to describe what had happened accurately. Remi's patience began to slip ever so slightly. If there was a chance, he needed to go. He needed to find Isla.

Sam stared at Remi for a long, drawn out second before he answered as he thought about it. Isla's body was still there now, but...he knew it wouldn't be when they left. Couldn't be. They never were. As long as he could keep Remi away from the Outskirts he could keep this a secret forever, not let him know there was a body to find. As far as he was concerned the body didn't matter anyway. Isla was dead, gone; the things that made her her had already left and the body was now just a mangled shell that would only make them both upset. "No. No...no b-body. The monsters don't...leave b-bodies. They d-destroy everyone they...they kill. She's...g-gone." He informed, glad to at least be saying something true. Remi asked him what was hard to explain and he almost forgot what he'd said, the moments coming one after another and each one darker than the last. "The draw. Th...that the Luxere had. We had t-to go. I don't...th..think anyone else died." Samuel This time I might just disappear

I'll stay here with you until this dream is gone

The meager amount of hope that Remi felt was clawed unceremoniously from his body. His jaw tightened and the feeling of tears ran up the bridge of his nose and behind his eyes. He felt his hands tensing in the places they still held Sam's wrists, his eyes belatedly looking at the wounds on his hands.

"You..think? They are still out there?" The alchemist asked, though there was no judgement in his voice. Sam wasn't the type to boldly protect those around him. He was perhaps stronger given the lack of sunlight, but he was still who he was. And as Remi had told him once and affirmed many times thereafter, he didn't expect him to be anymore than that.

"Why did you not wake me, Sam? I could have gone with you. I.." The words choked in his throat, and Remi clenched his teeth together as he looked down at Sam, thinking the words but not able to say them: I might have been able to save her.

"They're always o-out there." Sam confirmed. During Longnight he imagined there was always a pulsating and needy crowd of monsters waiting outside the door, ready to pounce on the faintest hint of life. Regardless of whether that was true he was sure if they went hunting for Isla they would come across at least one creature that meant them harm. He let his wrists be held, too tired to put up any kind of resistance even as Remi's grip made his cuts sting. Why hadn't he woken Remi? He'd just not thought to. Or rather, he'd not wanted to endanger him...but even that wasn't really true. He'd just seen the Luxere and felt he had to go himself, for some vague nebulous reason. Sam wasn't quite sure what Remi was about to say, but he knew how much he loved to be the hero, to save the day. Maybe he was going to say he could have saved Sam harm, that he could have saved Isla. Either one he thought likely impossible. "...I..d-don't know. But..it wa-wasn't just me. There were o..other p-people. If she could have b-been saved, she w-would h..have been....and the c-cold hurt me first. I got th..these coming home." Samuel This time I might just disappear

I'll stay here with you until this dream is gone

Remi shook his head. "No, the others. You said you did not think anyone else had died. But if you came back ... do you not know? Are they still out there?"

He listened, hands curling around Sam's wrists but not realizing the pain he was causing. "No Sam, I am not blaming you." Remi said softly, lowering their hands down towards their knees and softening his grip. "And I am not saying I could have done any better I just ... " But the alchemist was far too calm. Remi, who teared up at the drop of anything, dry-eyed with his voice relatively steady. "Come on. Lets go to the infirmary. There are bandages there for your hands.."

Rising, Remi offered to take Sam by the elbows (not his hands, obviously).