don't let me go

Cordelia

It wasn't strange having Noah back. None of it was, really. The strangeness came with why he left in the first place. The things that kept him away. His new calling. Cordelia was happy for him. Truly. To have something else to work towards. A new calling. A new way to fight for what's important to him. A way to protect Halo and the ones he loves.

But Cordelia knew what it meant. That it would pull him away from her. From the home they built. A selfish part of her hates this. Hates that he'll be gone from her again. Never in one place for long and brought into dangerous positions at an increasing rate.

These thoughts swirled through her head as she sat at the edge of the pool, feet dangling into the water, bottom lip caught between her teeth as she watched the sun slowly sink towards the horizon. They hadn't decided what they were doing yet. If they'd be returning to King's End together or if Noah was leaving them to head back to Stormbreak. Once more she felt displaced and unsure. She longed for the familiarity of home. Of their small cabin site hidden in the woods. The longer things went on, the more Cordelia began to wonder if anywhere would ever be home for more than a season.

All the king's horses, all the king's men
Couldn't put me together again

There was so much of the world that was changing, it was not just the two of them. Plans unfolded and emerged into light. His new role, this part he had to play in the world, was so much bigger than just him. It was bigger than all of them. There were days when Noah doubted his ability to live up to the expectation of what was before him. Could he truly do Vi well? Would the god be proud of him, his efforts, and what he contributed? It all swam within him -- the dichotomy of both confidence that Noah knew Vi had chosen him for a reason, as well as the doubt he felt. But when he was with her, it was all easier to swallow. If only for a moment. "What do you think you'll do?" Noah asked, settling down next to her as she draped her feet into the water. Noah Olson When the night is cold and you feel like no-one knows what it's like to be the only one buried in this hole You can make it to the sunrise

Cordelia

She'd been so lost in her thoughts that she hadn't even realized he approached. Cordelia felt her shoulders slump, the complexity of it all weighing on her, leaving her silent as a mix of emotions that were much too complex to unwrap moved along the bond that tethered them. "I don't know, Noah… I should check on my family. See how things are in Halo. If they fared well." It's what she should do.

What she wanted to do?

Well that was entirely something else. She wanted to follow him. Stay with him. He needed her, right? They were a team. This last season did nothing but cement that in her mind. With a glance his way, amber eyes met glacier, searching his gaze for an answer she wasn't sure he could give her, but she found herself looking anyway. "I- I don't want to leave you." The admission was quiet as her cheeks flushed pink, fingers curling tighter into the loose wrap around her shoulders, an uncertainty flickering along the bond.

All the king's horses, all the king's men
Couldn't put me together again

His arm brushed against hers as he settled in next to her. The way her body deflated and the feelings she let slip freely over the bond were not lost on him. His first instinct was to reach an arm around her and pull her close, to reassure her that everything was going to be okay. But was it? He hesitated any movements, simply just taking in her warmth beside him. ”I met with the leader of the Order. I told him of my intentions to go back to Halo and free her people from the influence of the Voice." He let his eyes cast forward, away from hers, and out onto the water. The sun glittered across the surface ripples, far out from the tide pools that surrounded them. "I don't want to keep you away from what you love. I don't want you to be miserable." He sighed, rough fingers fidgeting with each other. ”I can't ask you to sacrifice anything else for me. I want you to do what you think is best, for you." Partners or not, friends or not, Noah knew he did not have a right to wield her life. It was not his. ”I want you to be with me, but I can't crush you because of it." And that was truly what he felt like he was doing now. With the way his life had changed so suddenly, and the plans they had made were going to change, Noah did not want to destroy her. Noah Olson When the night is cold and you feel like no-one knows what it's like to be the only one buried in this hole You can make it to the sunrise

Cordelia

An almost pained sound rose in the back of her throat like that of a wounded animal. Pitiful and high, a displeasure at his words flaring so brightly that the feeling even surprised her, "You never asked me to sacrifice a single thing. I chose you. I went with you because- because I couldn't bear the thought of you being alone. Halo… Halo wouldn't have felt right without you." There. It was out. Part of the reason she left it behind. Why she was still lingering here instead of splitting off from them. Because Halo wasn't Halo without Noah.

Her head fell against his shoulder and tentatively she reached for his hand, tangling their fingers together and gripping tightly, her thumb tracing across a scar against the line of his hand. "The fact that you think you'd ever hurt me is laughable, Noah Olsen. That you think me being with you would crush me?" She huffed out a noise that mimicked a laugh, a small smile curling on pink lips as she let her eyes slip closed for the span of a breath, willing herself to relax.

"The only thing that would crush me is if something happened to you and I wasn't there." It wasn't entirely true, but that's how it felt in this moment. That's how it felt when he had disappeared. The worry had gnawed away at her until they received his letter. Only then had she been able to breathe again. The idea of it happening again was enough to make her heart seize painfully in her chest.

All the king's horses, all the king's men
Couldn't put me together again

The noise she made startled him, and his head snapped around and eyes locked on her, forgetting the view of the pools before them. Ultimately, she was right. She had chosen to stay with him, to stay with Deimos, with the hope of rebuilding the home they knew to what they knew it to be, and to rid it of the influence of the Voice. She had left her family because she believed it to be right. She couldn't stay in Halo without him, and she could no longer stay in Halo with Morgan as their Warden, the traitor that she was. He sighed, and then her hands reached for his, he lace his fingers between her's. "I think my life is going to be filled with more danger than it ever has been before." He said, lowering his eyes to their hands. His voice was worried, but mostly for her. Worried that her fears would be overwhelming in the light of what his life meant now. Not only would Noah be fighting in this war, he believed he would have a part in leading it. That meant leaving her...and it meant possibly leaving her without him, forever. Noah Olson When the night is cold and you feel like no-one knows what it's like to be the only one buried in this hole You can make it to the sunrise

Cordelia

There wasn't any escaping this. The new fate he found himself wrapped up in. What it meant for him, her, them. This barely budding connection at risk of being torn out at the root before it could even begin to truly grow. Cordelia was quiet for a long moment, the feelings along the bond as tempestuous as the oceans that surrounded them now, roiling along the bond in waves she struggled to contain. Fear, worry, desire, and need all wrapped up into one overwhelming force that threatened to steal her breath.

Amber eyes search glacier and she sucked in a sharp breath, a free hand coming up to cup his cheek, fingertips trembling as they skate across his cheekbone before curling slightly into his hair. "Then let me be with you. I'll get stronger. I'll do whatever I have to do, but I'm not leaving you." Cordelia stressed, leaning into him, closing the space a fraction further until she was almost straddling him. It was a bold move. One she likely wouldn't have attempted before, but the need to get her point across, to make her intentions utterly and completely clear was nearly as overwhelming as the need to be close to him.

To feel his reassuring heat and warmth. The solid muscle of his body against the softeness of her curves, harboring her against the slight chill that hung in the air, keeping her shielded from the world in a way that no one else simply could.

All the king's horses, all the king's men
Couldn't put me together again

There is an urgency across the bond that Noah matches as she moved her body. The hunter leaned back, letting her crawl over him and envelope him. His hands moved down without any prompting to rest on her hips. They were gentle, but should any movement be made he wasn't sure how long that gentleness would last. "Cordelia," He started, his eyes never leaving her's, as she took hold of him. Even if he wanted to look away, he wasn't sure that he could. "Stay." He breathed out, his hands running from her hips to the small of her back. "I'll protect you. We can protect each other -- if you want to stay, I won't let you go." His sentence was barely over before his lips were touching hers. He kissed her without reservation, leaning up into her. It had been over a year since Noah had had such affection, but there was something about this embrace that was different. Cordelia had been a part of his life for a long time, if only distantly. As his lips met hers, it was like a puzzle. A piece that had been missing, swept under the rug for too long before finally it was revealed and put in place. One hand slid from the small of her back to her shoulderblades, pressing her body against his as he deepened the kiss, wishing never to forget how sweet she tasted. Noah Olson When the night is cold and you feel like no-one knows what it's like to be the only one buried in this hole You can make it to the sunrise

Cordelia

And if that wasn't the sweetest vow she'd ever heard. The warmest request said by the most comforting voice she could think of. Her breath left her in a stutter, a shiver running up her spine as goosebumps erupted across her skin, leaving her pressing all the closer to his warmth. Every nerve ending seemed to sing as his fingers pressed to the small of her back, rough palms teasing against the barely exposed sliver of skin, chest rising and falling quickly. "I don't want you to." It's all she managed before his lips were on hers.

There had been fumblings before. A few cold kisses shared in the snow that were all numb lips and awkwardness. A few clumsy gropings beneath furs, but never before had she felt so free. So right. So whole. It's like flying and yet she's grounded in his arms. The fingers in his hair tighten and she let her lips part, tasting him with a tentative swipe of her tongue, commiting it all to memory. Only when the need for air is too pressing to ignore does she finally manage to break the kiss. Her hand smoothed up his chest, curling at his shoulder and into his collar, holding there tightly as she caught her breath, forehead pressed against his.

"I'm never leaving you again. Where you go, I go. Okay?" Even if it meant waiting on the sidelines in a camp nearby. She'd be close. Always.

All the king's horses, all the king's men
Couldn't put me together again

Noah took time to breathe her in. He kept his hands moving over her body, feeling the warmth she was pressed against him. He could feel his heart beating in his throat every time he looked into her eyes. Trepidation and excitement mixed together over the bond, easy for her to feel. The fear of having his heart torn again, but the joy of having someone to care intimately for struggling to take the throne within him. He pressed gentle kisses along her jawbone as she spoke, one hand reaching to tuck a strand of auburn hair behind a sunkissed ear. "I think I want you to stay with Deimos, for now. Until I've got more things figured out, and I don't have to go back and forth to Stormbreak as often. He can't go to Stormbreak, and I don't want him to be alone. He's our family." Noah sighed, hands running idly down her spine and back up again, but glacier eyes never leaving the beautiful pools of amber he found himself swimming in. He wanted to be with Cordelia, that was true. It would be a lie for him to say he did not want her to accompany him on all he had to do, on going to Stormbreak. But Deimos needed them as much as they needed him, and the Sentinel did not want the Sword to be alone. "Train with him and learn from him. Take care of him. He's just as broken as we are -- we need each other to help put the pieces back in, and make new pieces." The hunter finished, leaning up and forward to press his forehead into her's, and to draw her back to lay across his chest. Noah Olson When the night is cold and you feel like no-one knows what it's like to be the only one buried in this hole You can make it to the sunrise

Cordelia

There were protests already forming on her lips and it was hard to bite them back, but then he held her gaze, letting his feelings flow along the bond and envelope her just as his arms did. Cordelia sighed softly, exhaling a warm tickle against his face as she managed a nod, fingers tightening their grip on him further until they threatened to turn white at the knuckles even as she leaned into his touch. ”What about going to Halo? Will he accompany me? Should I go without him?” That was a concern they had to deal with now. She needed to check on her family as well as see where things were with the rest of the people. What Morgan had or hadn’t done in the time that she was away.

”If It is what you think is best then I will stay with him. We’ll reinforce the camp. Build it up a bit more. Make it into a home.” Somewhere that he could return to. A place where she would always be waiting for him. Where she’d been waiting for him since he first left. Cordelia wasn’t difficult to move as he decided to shift them to lay back against the still warm stone, the sounds of gulls and waves surrounding them, easing her breathing to match his.

”What are you meant to do next?” She asked softly, drawing her bottom lip between her teeth as her fingers skated idly across his chest, tracing patterns into the exposed skin at his chest.

All the king's horses, all the king's men
Couldn't put me together again

Noah rolled them over so that their were both on their sides, staring each other in the eye. He shifted some to get more comfortable on the warm rocks, angling his arm to rest his head in the palm of his hand and his elbow against the rocks. "I...don't know what to do about Halo. It is still not advisable for Deimos or I to return...at least not to the Citadel. The Order told me about a relic trapped in the Sea of Glass. There is a possibility they will ask me, as well as Deimos, to help retrieve it. We're still figuring out all the details..." He let his thought wander off for a moment, nearly unable to keep everything straight as he looked into her eyes. "I just want you to stay safe. I don't know what the right answer is. I don't...there is just so much I don't know. I think I will return to Stormbreak, if only briefly. I need to gather some more information, get some more bearings beneath me. I need to figure out what the next right answer is." He sighed, the indecision clear in his mind. He didn't know what they should do right now -- Noah just needed to get as much knowledge as he could. "I wrote a letter to Ronin, asking him to meet with me so we can discuss some things. He is a part of the order, and is the demigod of Vi's herald. I think I will need to work with him closely." Noah Olson When the night is cold and you feel like no-one knows what it's like to be the only one buried in this hole You can make it to the sunrise

Cordelia

The hunter sighed softly as Noah moved them to their sides, curling her smaller body into his, letting her head rest in the crook of her arm as she held his gaze. Unbothered by the hardness of the stone, Cordelia let herself relax despite the heaviness of the conversation, listening to his words carefully. ”Another relic?” The fact that it was trapped beneath the Sea of Glass was definitely going to prove to be a problem. The fact that both Deimos and Noah might be leaving again was simply the cherry on top. She drew in a long breath, holding it as she considered her words, knowing that he’d feel her mix of emotions along their shared bond. ”If they do I could make the first part of the trek with you before splitting off towards Halo proper.”

His worry and tension was palpable. Cordelia didn’t hesitate to reach out, cupping his cheek with her hand and brushing her thumb across his skin, ”I’ll be safe. If it would be best for me to stay in King’s End while you travel then I’ll do that. If I need to go to Halo with Sah then I’ll do that. If you want me standing outside of the gates of Stormbreak waiting for you there, then I’ll do that too. I don’t have all the answers and I don’t expect you to either, but we’ll figure it out together.” She murmured, leaning forward to brush her lips against his in an act of reassurance, attempting to ease his concern if only for a moment.

”I think that’s a good idea. I’m sure he’ll have some inclination of what you’re meant to be doing. If his goddess is the herald of Vi your tasks would likely be similar.” At least that’s what she thought. Cordelia couldn’t be sure, but she hoped for Noah’s case that was true.

All the king's horses, all the king's men
Couldn't put me together again

Noah nodded. "Beneath the Sea of Glass. You know as well as I do that all of Halo knows something is under there, and if its anything like what has guarded the other relics, it will be a fight to retrieve it." Noah's voice was soft as he spoke, but across the attuned bond there was some fragments of worry. "I want to be as honest with you as I can." Which meant he wanted always to share with her what was on his heart and his mind, what was happening in his life. "I decided to join the Order." He paused for a moment to let that sink in, before continuing. "I don't want this to be advertised to the world, but I have been assured that I have ever power the Order offers at my disposal when it comes to matters of Vi's will." He leaned forward to press a kiss into her forehead, her skin warm against his lips from the touch of the sun. "I think you'll be most safe with Deimos. I know I said before you should go back to Halo...but after talking with Sah I don't think that is right. He said there was a mass exodus after Morgan's attack. There's not many people there left. And since the longnight monster showed up..." Noah trailed off some, pressing another kiss to her forehead. "Deimos is the strongest of us all and he can protect you the best." Above all else, he wanted her to be safe. Noah Olson When the night is cold and you feel like no-one knows what it's like to be the only one buried in this hole You can make it to the sunrise