clinging to the edge

Ashe the woods are lovely, dark, and deep but i have promises to keep    The return home was a blur. Percy limped behind Kysma, and Kalt held her securely in front of him upon her saddle. She was slipping into an easy numbness - a familiar one. It was murky and cold and dark and silent. Blessedly silent. Snippets of sound crept in through the cracks in her grief - the sound of hooves, unicorns huffing, the saddle creaking beneath them. Every time, Ronin's voice came with it, and she fled back into herself.    She stood almost frozen outside the house when they arrived. She stood with the unicorns, and Percy stood close to her with his head curled over her shoulder. Ashe absently stroked his neck, played with his mane, as keenly aware of his hurts as she was of her own. One of his golden horns brushed over her cheek, and she leaned her head against his with hollow exhaustion.    Kalt had left Theea with their sitter, and now the was taking the little girl out somewhere - somewhere not there, perhaps to the woman's house. Regardless... their little one didn't need to see Ashe wounded and covered in blood like this. He returned to bring the horses around the back of the home, to the small shelter and paddock that had been made for them, but Ashe didn't part from Percy, not yet. No matter any commands to rest, she couldn't. Not until Percy was taken care of. The coal-and-snow dappled unicorn had just fought an impossible battle with her, been knocked back by a blast, and still came to her to help her walk. Heedless of her burns, her cuts, what she was confident was a dislocated left arm, she checked the stallion over while Kalt tended to Kysma.    He nudged her softly with his nose and a huff as she assessed the few cuts on his legs, the burns over the right side of his chest and shoulder, the cuts on his face. He would be alright, but he would be sore for some time. Ashe leaned her forehead against his for a long moment, and she felt his anguish as surely as she felt her own. He didn't understand what wounded his rider's soul, but he nickered to her softly all the same. "Thank you," she whispered against his forelock.    She felt the swelling again in her chest, her throat constricting as her eyes welled. How were there even any tears left? Ashe stayed there with Percy's head pressed to her torso, burned hand stroking his cheek and neck. Her lip trembled, and she squeezed her eyes shut. She immediately had to open them when she was greeted with the sight of a roguish smile and shining cobalt eyes.    Ashe turned her head - still leaning against Percy's - and looked to Kalt. "He's hurt," she rasped quietly. and miles to go before i sleep.

"Ashe..." The voice that sounded from the entrance to the paddock was quiet and sad - Vervain had just bundled an infant into a broken man's arms and let him go despite her internal protests. Remi needed to do whatever kept him sane for now, and apparently that was taking care of Ronin's baby daughter. So now Vai was doing what whatever would keep her sane, and that was taking care of her own daughter. "Ashe, I'm so fucking sorry," she whispered, stepping into the paddock, her stormy eyes wet with tears already. She glanced from the unicorn to the assassin and smiled weakly, shaking her head. "He's hurt," she agreed. "And so are you. Come and sit down, please?" vervain well i'll rest my eyes and i'll let the earth breathe

Kalt didn’t speak as he removed Kysma’s tack, patting the unicorn on the neck and exhaling heavily through his nose. He stood by the dark equine, their emotions playing off of each other, both trying to settle the stress the other was feeling, but it was hopeless until the pain lifted. He knew it would be rough to go.       Turning to face Ashetta with a small and obviously forced smile, Kalt didn’t move closer. He watched her with the stallion, a somber expression making him look perhaps a touch more tired than he normal did. His eyes found the cracks in hers when she turned to face him, and he nodded, approaching her.       As he was about to answer her, Vervain spoke and broke his train of thought. Kalt turned his head to face the other woman and dropped his eyes to the floor with a quiet sigh. He wasn’t looking for anything confrontational after that fight, and from the look in Vai’s eyes, she wasn’t either. Though he might not be her biggest fan, Kalt wasn’t going to stand in a mother’s way.       Giving Ashe a gentle smile and touching her arm carefully, Kalt put his hand on Percy’s neck. “Go to your mom,” he whispered down the bond. “I’ll heal Percy.” Both him and Vai had healing magic, but he had a feeling that Vai needed her daughter as much as Ashe needed her mother. He stood by the stallion, moving his hand over the injuries which would quickly begin to heal. Luckily they were mostly superficial, so there wasn’t a ton that had to be done for him. Ashe’s were worse, but he had a feeling Vai could handle it. If not, well, he was no stranger to patching Ashe up. kalt CHIN UP KID, THEY’D KILL TO SEE YOU FALL

Ashe the woods are lovely, dark, and deep but i have promises to keep    Her eyes jumped from Kalt and to Vervain when she spoke. She didn't lift her head from Percy's, her hands smoothing beneath the curve of his horns.  The I'm sorry thing came again, and she had to hold her breath. The words were painful and harsh no matter how gentle they came - they made it real. She turned her head to press her brow to the stallion's, releasing the breath slowly. Hurt. She was hurt too.    Ashe glanced up at the silent words from Kalt, pressing her lips together. "Thank you," she murmured silently back. With a tired nod, she pressed a kiss to Percy's head before she stepped away, her hand brushing Kalt's. Percy himself nickered appreciatively to Kalt, a large head turning to bump against the man's shoulder. Ashe might have smiled before.. The girl turned to face her mother then. There were tears in her eyes, and her chest ached powerfully as she dragged her feet to the witch.    She glanced down at herself as she stopped before Vai. The pains were trickling in, but she'd had far worse, and none of it could compare to the other pain. One that was too much to be real, too outlandish to consider, that he could truly be --    Her face still streaked with the evidence of tears turned up to her mother, swallowing hard past the lump in her throat. "Is.. is Remi.. is he okay?" she managed hoarsely. His scream echoed in those hollow reached of her, and she nearly flinched at everything that came with that. and miles to go before i sleep.

Vai waited for Ashe to come to her in her own time, the witch reaching out to carefully smooth her hair out of her face when she was close enough. "No," she whispered. "I don't think he is, Ashe. I don't think any of us are." Gently, like she was made of glass, Vai enveloped her daughter in a hug, blinking back the tears that threatened to fall. "I saw what happened," she murmured gently, resisting the urge to say what was in her heart - that she was glad Ashe was alive. "Let's get you cleaned up, okay?" Already Vai's hands were pulsing with a warm, soft light, and as she embraced Ashe some of the injuries she had sustained would be closing up, skin knitting back into place, bruises fading, muscles repairing. If her daughter allowed, she would turn to lead them out of the paddock, not letting her go even a little. "You'll have to show me around though. I've not been here." vervain well i'll rest my eyes and i'll let the earth breathe

Ashe the woods are lovely, dark, and deep but i have promises to keep    No, of.. course Remi wasn't okay. She nodded, unable to form any other words as her mother's arms moved around her. She didn't know what to do other than let her arms rise just barely behind Vervain's shoulders. No.. none of them were okay. Nothing was okay. This was wrong...    She silently followed her mother's guidance out of the little paddock, she could feel the physical relief in her burned arm first. She had almost forgotten that her wounds were hurting until Vai worked her magic through her even as they walked. She had also almost forgotten her mother had never been here before, and she nodded again. ”Percy is okay?” she asked Kalt silently as she and Vervain disappeared inside - he would follow, wouldn't he? She tried to work through where to lead her mother, where to go, where to sit, what.. what was she supposed to do? What the fuck was she supposed to do now?    She paused a few steps into the front door that opened into the livingroom, her eyes glancing dimly around the space. Comfortable and even luxurious in its furnishings, it was home, but she was far away. ”There are, uh.. there are rags in the kitchen.” She lead her forward towards the room that branched off, where there was a basin of clean water already waiting within the counter. She reached for the drawer where she knew kitchen rags would be waiting, but a look at her ruined sleeve had her pause. Then she looked at her other arm. Her chest, her whole torso.. a glance at her reflection in the water and she found the same thing on her face.    Blood. Ronin's blood, when he held her -    Ashe started shaking. Breath grew shallow and rapid, and her hand fumbled for the drawer of rags as her eyes started blurring again. Her arms plunged into that water basin with a gasp, her trembling hands scrubbing furiously. Off - she, she had to get it off - she couldn't breathe -  he was fine, he wasn't - he wasn't -- and miles to go before i sleep.

Vai followed on quiet feet into the house, her blue eyes glancing around and taking it all in, though commenting on something as banal as the decor in a situation like this seemed ridiculous. So instead she merely nodded to her daughter, letting her magic soothe away the worst of the injuries before releasing her to head into the kitchen. Making a beeline for the basin of water, she turned just in time to see Ashe gazing at the blood on her clothes, as though seeing it for the first time. "Hey," she said gently, barely having the chance to get out of the way before the assassin plunged her arms into the water. Vai barely had the chance to clasp her hands around Ashe's shoulders, giving them a warm squeeze even as she scrubbed at all the blood. "Ashe, breathe. Close your eyes and breathe, just for a second. Okay? I'm here, take it slow." vervain well i'll rest my eyes and i'll let the earth breathe

Ashe the woods are lovely, dark, and deep but i have promises to keep    She jumped at the hands on her shoulders, but she didn't look up. She couldn't. Instead Ashe started trying to frantically wipe away the drying blood on her arms, over her chest. She couldn't breathe, could hardly see, and --    Her eyes finally flashed up to Vai with fresh tears. Breathe. She couldn't, it didn't seem to want to fill her lungs at all, and she couldn't stop shaking. Vervain was there though, her mother and she listened: her eyes squeezed shut, and she tried to breath, but the air was stuck and ballooning painfully in her chest. It bust from her with a short crack as her head bowed beneath the weight grief. Grief. She didn't want that word in her head, she didn't want to go through it again, she couldn't, she wouldn't, he was fine, he was fine.    'Give them hell.' There weren't supposed to be last words between them. Her teeth clenched as her dripping wet hands braced on the edges of the water basin with white knuckles, tears somehow finding their way through lids that were screwed tightly shut. A sob cracked open from her chest and she stayed that way for a beat before she could move. Breathe. She had to breathe.    She opened her eyes and forced a long and slow breath through shaking lips, then pulled in slowly, released it slowly again. The assassin swallowed past the rough dryness in her throat before she turned raw eyes to her mother. "We were so close," she said, her voice cracking. and miles to go before i sleep.

Vai waited quietly by as her daughter tried to anchor herself, and when she turned around the witch enveloped her in another hug, holding her close and leaning gently back against the countertop. "I know, Ashe. I know," she whispered, kissing her dark hair and carefully wiping at the tears that streaked her cheeks. "I know you were. It isn't fair and it isn't right. You feel however you need to feel. I'm not going anywhere, okay? You've got me, and you've got Kalt. And you've got Ronin." Her smile was sad, Vai resting a gentle hand over Ashe's chest, by her heart. "In here, even if you can't speak to him anymore. Here is where we keep all our most precious people. It's where your father lives, for me. Keep Ronin close - he'd never want to feel like he made you sad." vervain well i'll rest my eyes and i'll let the earth breathe

Ashe the woods are lovely, dark, and deep but i have promises to keep    Ashe let out another shaking breath and leaned into her mother's embrace, letting her eyes fall shut as she tucked her head against the witch's chest. She breathed in deeply, trying to flee from the finality of what she was saying as her hand was placed over the assassin's heart. "I don't want him there," she said roughly, knowing full well how much of a child she sounded like. It didn't matter what she wanted, did it? "He should be here. We should be celebrating."    The wolf girl picked up her head then at the sound of a hiccup from the kitchen island. Her eyes found a pair of long legs poking out from within Kalt's cigar box that hovered from the surface of the counter, eyes gleaming from within. She watched silently as Soot pulled himself from within the pitch black box - he was fond of it, as if it were a nest of sorts. He fell clumsily from within with a squeak, but he was soon skittering down the counter and across the floor to the feet of the assassin.    Ashe sniffed and leaned down to coax the spider into her hands, the size of a small cat now. He chittered quietly at her as she stroked a hand over his fuzzy body, and he quickly was nestling against her shoulder with what could only be described as very sad spider eyes. "I'm alright," she lied quietly to Soot.    She looked back at her mother, and her hands fell uselessly to her sides. Ashe leaned back against the counter beside Vai, and she stared out into the kitchen with water still dripping from her hands. The quiet was settling in again, a smothering sort silence in her soul. She couldn't seem to connect the pieces in her head: Ronin smirking at her just a few hours ago. Just a few hours...    There was a special breed of darkness that Ashe knew very well. One that called to her now with a comforting and murky depth she could lose herself in. Easier to do that than accept that no matter how many minutes passed, she wasn't going to be able to find Ronin again. She wanted his blood off of her, as if erasing the evidence of this would erase it from ever having happened.. but she couldn't seem to make herself move now. Soot moved against her, brushed a furry leg against her cheek silently, but she didn't move. "This is wrong," she whispered to no one in particular. and miles to go before i sleep.

"I know, Ashe," Vai murmured to her daughter, smiling sadly and stepping back from her for a moment to let her tend to Soot. The little wine spider was a gentle creature and he had done Ashe a lot of good, as far as she could tell. At least she'd had something to care for, when life had been darkest. Well... she'd also had Kalt and Theea, and Vervain was just beginning to understand the impact that the other assassin had on her life. Leaning back against the counter with her, she wiped at her eyes and let out a long sigh. "Yes, it is wrong." She nodded in agreement. "But I heard a lot of... disagreements, out where we were watching the fight. I have a bad feeling that this is only the beginning of how wrong this might get." vervain well i'll rest my eyes and i'll let the earth breathe