a candle's fire

REXANNA they say that war is hell, but true hell begins when the battle ends — Phoebe’s concern over her first tangle with an Ascended made her smile slightly at the memory. “No, I wanted to experience it.” She offered, hoping it might relieve some of the worries that Phoebe might have about what had happened. Yet Rexanna still hadn’t expected to pass out from it, and luckily with Bastien despite it being his first time had been incredibly careful to not allow that to happen. But the conversation shifted, and Rexanna’s laugh floated on the wind when Phoebe’s face turned completely red and she stuttered over the words. But when she called him ’Mr. Bitey’ it brought upon a whole other series of giggles from the woman. She’d certainly have to call Bastien by that nickname at least once during this entire thing. But she was concerned how to bring it up with Phoebe – knowing her and Bastien’s history and their general clashing, that she was at a complete loss as to how to tell her who it was. She couldn’t avoid the question. After all, the bubble was small and word traveled fast. Her smile faltered slightly as she glanced back to Phoebe and wrung her hands together, inhaling deeply. “Please don’t be upset with me.” She began, chewing on her lip briefly. She didn’t know who all knew that Bastien was alive in the first place, and so she figured she could explain it in a way that made sense without pointing too many fingers at Bastien. “Uh well, Bastien became Ascended.” She wasn’t sure if she should cover it up with telling Phoebe that the old man had run off – it wasn’t an entire lie after all, but she ignored the need to tell her anything about the old man. “We’ve been spending a lot of time together and it just kind of happened.” She paused, eyes widening slightly as she looked to Phoebe. “I know you two don’t get along, but he’s changed since becoming Ascended. He’s treating me very well.” She added. and you're the only one who's hands drip red. the real war rages in your heart; it always has.

Phoebe

I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?

Phoebe sighed in relief when Rexanna said everything had been consensual. So long as that was the case, then she had nothing to worry about.

Well, except maybe what the answer was to Mr. Bitey’s identity. After her little giggle, Rex seemed to struggle to answer it. Was it really so bad? If Rex liked him and he liked her, he couldn’t be that awful right? And why would she be upset? It’s not like she was dating…

Bastien

The young midwife just stared, blankly, her mind having come to a complete and sudden halt. She only vaguely processed Rexanna’s explanations. She just stared at her in silence for several very long moments, trying to wrap her mind around this new information. ”So…so who was the really rude old guy at his house? I thought he died, there was a funeral and everything from what I heard…” she asked lightly, brow furrowing in confusion, eyes still glazed as if staring off into the distance.

Rex…was dating Bastien…who was Mr. Bitey…and somehow not dead…?

REXANNA they say that war is hell, but true hell begins when the battle ends — She looked to Phoebe to await her reaction, gnawing nervously at her lower lip. And she watched as the words hit her friend and sunk in, almost watching the midwife freeze. But then, she began to speak and spoke of the old man (Bastien) that had been rude and what happened to him. A look of confusion crossed her face, years of calculated and cool masking that she had acquired in her previous life as she looked to Phoebe and nodded. “I don’t know what happened to him. But I went to the funeral, and you’re right. The old man was a crab.” She offered with a quiet laugh. But she decided to explain how she found out about Bastien, effectively avoiding her conversation with the old man after the funeral entirely. “But Bastien had gone to speak to the Voice, and that’s why he wasn’t around. Perhaps the old man thought he’d died? I don’t know what to make of it, really.” She paused, head tilting as she calculated it. “Bastien came to me to apologize that he was gone after he helped soothe a panic attack of mine over Longnight. Told me he’d been Ascended, and well… That was that.” She finally said, resulting in a soft smile crossing her face. He had been kind to her, but before when they had shared that same space in the Rathskeller he had been immensely warm, comfortable, kind. He was still those things to her now, perhaps a bit more comforting and a bit less warm in terms of body heat. She rolled her shoulders in a shrug before sighing quietly. “But yeah.” She tried to continue, uncertain of how to. She could talk about the kindness Bastien had showed her, of his nervousness when he asked, but with Emmett fresh on Phoebe’s brain she imagined it probably wasn’t the time. and you're the only one who's hands drip red. the real war rages in your heart; it always has.

Phoebe

I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?

If Phoebe had ever encountered the Voice, or had any understanding of how Ascended's really worked, she may have had the point of reference to compare her brain to a short circuiting machine, or her internal voice matching the measured automated tone of the new goddess. As it was, the only word Phoebe had was broken. Her brain was broken. Broked.

Nothing quite added up. The old man had shown up after Long Night and yet Rexanna was saying Bastien had been ascended before then? Ascended's weren't dead they were...ascended or something something. Words were hard. Brown eyes blinked at Rex, unable to really form her question of how could someone confuse an ascended with a dead person. Did it really matter though? She saw the smile on Rex's face, heard the hesitancy in her voice. She was happy but...worried because she was of course painfully aware of how she and Bastien did not get along. At all. Under any circumstances. Phoebe pressed her lips together and swallowed a lump in her throat. It didn't matter that she didn't like Bastien. What mattered was that Rexanna did, and he made her happy...but some miracle that certainly only Frey could perform.

"Ah...I'm...happy for you." she managed with a small smile. It was true, she was happy for Rex. Bastien...well..."He doesn't deserve you but I am happy you are happy...but if he hurts you I will get my sister in law to beat his face in you know. She was the one with the sword fighting the Spire Demon." she said with an assured nod. Oh yeah. Bastien better walk on eggshells with her friend or Phoebe would see to it he regretted the day for the rest of his very short life that would follow after.

REXANNA they say that war is hell, but true hell begins when the battle ends — At Phoebe’s reaction and sudden swallow without adding any kind of remarks, Rexanna breathed a bit easier. And she listened intently while Phoebe stumbles over the words, of being happy for her, and she nodded. Though she was sad to know that Phoebe was currently running through heartbreak, only to have Rex come in and tell her about her wonderful relationship. But Phoebe wasn’t done yet, and her head tilted back to her friend as she spoke of Bastien not deserving her and the usual “if he hurts you” spiel she had imagined most friends would do. But it was nice, in a way, to have someone willing to do that here. Back in Asciend there wasn’t such a thing— but Rexanna had no choice in that matter either. At least here, she had the ability to leave and never have to answer for it. But she nodded to Phoebe instead, offering her a wolffish grin. “Thank you.” She began before stretching out her hands over the side of the bridge. “If it came to it, though, I imagine I could handle him too.” She said thoughtfully, stepping a bit closer to Phoebe as she aimed her hands above the side of the bone bridge. She reached for the well of magic deep within her and pulled it up higher and higher until a bright light erupted from her hands and shot into the sky, high above the edge of the bone bridge. When it reached its peak, it exploded into thousands of glimmering, fiery pieces that shot down from the sky on the gentle winds. Her sapphire gaze followed each tiny trail until they winked out before she turned back to Phoebe with a small shrug. “He has a bad reputation, but he’s only ever been kind to me. I don’t imagine it will change but I’ll keep you updated, if you prefer.” She said after a moment before giving Phoebe a small smile. “As for Emmett, perhaps the boy could use a bit of fire under his ass to figure himself out?” She questioned with another roguish grin and thoughtful glance. and you're the only one who's hands drip red. the real war rages in your heart; it always has.

Phoebe

I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?

The sudden explosion from Rexanna's hand made Phoebe gasp and jump back a bit, eyes widen in momentary terror. But her expression melted into a small smile, a mirthless laugh escaping her lips. "I am glad you can handle him yourself, but the offer still stands." she said, stepping back over to Rex's side. She mentioned returning the favor on Emmett essentially and she sighed sadly, staring off into the distance. "Do you think that would really help? Or just make him hate me more?" she asked quietly, before looking over at Rexanna sadly. "Would it fix anything at all?" It wouldn't make him more mature. It wouldn't make him hate her less. It wouldn't make him want her again. It would probably just make everything worse honestly.

"I just...have to accept that...it probably can't be fixed." she said with a sigh, closing her eyes to keep tears from welling up. She needed to change the subject.

"Did I tell you I completed Frey's quest though?"

REXANNA they say that war is hell, but true hell begins when the battle ends — She agreed with Phoebe at the offer, knowing somewhere deep in her heart that she would never need it. How Bastien had become less sure, less full of himself, and inherently more concerned with her and his life here. That he was a rebellious sort, much like she was, only Rexanna had found she wasn’t quite as daring. Had hoped to use the new world she found herself in as a new beginning, a change and a chance to prove who she was. So far, she had done a great job — and she could see Bastien changing as well. But like most things, it would likely take time for people to see and understand the way that she understood him. Rexanna had all the time in the world, though. “I’m not sure, but I’m willing to chat with him.” She offered, turning back to Phoebe with a small smile as she lifted her hand in the hopes of resting it on her friend’s shoulder. But then Phoebe acknowledged it couldn’t be fixed, which Rexanna found a bit hard to believe, but she didn’t press the girl. Instead, her brows raised at the revelation of finishing Frey’s quest. “Oh! No you didn’t, but that is wonderful Phoebe!” She chimed with a brilliant grin. “Did you see them to turn it in?” She asked curiously, wondering what Frey would have said to finishing a quest. Rexanna hadn’t spoken to the god since their initial meeting, but she had known Frey had been watching. How else would her voice have come back normal? How would she have held that glamour over her that cascaded like a gilded light along her bones in a way she hadn’t even noticed until it had been pointed out? She was interested, and intrigued. and you're the only one who's hands drip red. the real war rages in your heart; it always has.

Phoebe

I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?

Phoebe smiled a little at Rex. She knew she was trying to be helpful. And the more she thought about it...could it get worse? He had left her after all. That was sort of the worst thing that could happen, right? "Well, if he was going to listen to anyone, it probably would be someone like you." she said with a little laugh. Rex was confident and strong, not mild and meek like herself. Only someone truly arrogant wouldn't take her seriously, and she didn't think arrogance was a flaw that Emmett had.

"Ah, no, actually they called me there. I didn't think that the one time counted, honestly." she said with a blush. But she supposed in their innocent way it had been rather passionate. Perhaps she needed to broaden her definition of the word to better understand why it had counted for Frey. "They asked me what I learned and then gave me a flower crown that will apparently make labor pleasurable for whoever wears it." she said and grinned a bit, still a bit in awe of the gift she had received. "It...really is a fantastic thing because sometimes the reprieve from the stress is all a woman needs...and now I've a way to give them that." she said, smiling over at Rex.

REXANNA they say that war is hell, but true hell begins when the battle ends — She didn’t really believe Phoebe when she said that Emmett would listen to her. In fact, many people had said that as of late — a voice for the people, with the grace and ability to hold her own. But she didn’t believe them. Rexanna has a well managed temper, but when pushed or threatened it would unleash an inferno. She could speak for people, had been trained as to how, had always had a voice in her profession before her status had been lifted. The difference was that Rexanna had never wanted to do it. And she had no true desire to do it now. Yet there were a few faces here that needed a calm conversation of dignity and understanding, with that calm collected mask that she bore for the more difficult of times. And it had never actually left her, she’d just buried it away to pull out on a rainy day. But she nodded to Phoebe regardless. And listened diligently as her question was answered. How Frey had summoned her to them, to tell Phoebe she had answered the quest. And she was happy for her friend, deep down that she had accomplished it. But the gift Frey had given Phoebe gave Rexanna pause, even though her face lit up with the item and the description. “That is great!” She said, happy for her friend yet that odd, burning sensation began to build in her chest and her gut again. When Phoebe spoke of it being a stressful time, Rexanna nodded and swallowed a bit hard. “It is a stressful time, quite painful as well.” She acknowledged, looking away from Phoebe and back over the side of the bridge. “But anything that helps for that is incredibly useful to a midwife!” She said, smiling softly as she shot a glance to Phoebe. and you're the only one who's hands drip red. the real war rages in your heart; it always has.

Phoebe

I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?

At first Phoebe smiled when Rex agreed that her gift was great; she certainly thought so after all. But it was the sort of gift that was difficult to understand the real complex meaning of if you weren't familiar with the task, either personally or in practice like Phoebe was. That Rex didn't think it dismissable made her very happy. "I sure think so. It can't be overused of course but I could save lives with this if used right." she said with a smile.

But she did notice a sort of tenseness to her friend, the way she swallowed with anxiousness, the look in her eye as she glanced away. Her brow furrowed a little, confusion crossing her expression as Rexanna spoke more...with a weight to her tone that gave the midwife pause. "You say that as if you know what it is like." she said a little skeptically, giving her friend a sideways glance. She knew Rexanna wanted children...but she had assumed that meant she had never had any. But now she spoke as if she had some context of understanding the importance of the gift she received.

REXANNA they say that war is hell, but true hell begins when the battle ends — Rexanna nodded as Phoebe spoke of the gift saving lives. And it could, it could keep so many wrong and terrible things from happening. It likely couldn’t have helped her any, but for others to not have to suffer the way she did, it was a blessing of a gift. And yet, as Phoebe asked if Rexanna knew from experience, she swallowed hard again. Of course she couldn’t keep it entirely a secret, and the way she had answered the statement had lined it up perfectly in a way she couldn’t avoid it without telling her friend later on. She leaned a bit harder on the side of the bone bridge, staring off into the distance seeing as she couldn’t really look at Phoebe while she told the story. It was… a while ago, and she was able to be her bubbly self since then. But the idea of children seemed wonderful, one day, if she had been capable. “I… I do actually.” She said softly, lowering her gaze to the fog that danced beneath the bone bridge. “I told you a lot about my past, but I’ll try to fill in some blanks of it.” She paused, chewing on her lip a bit as she figured out just where to start. “I was married to a Prince of the neighboring country, and things were fine for a time. But my heritage hadn’t been entirely truthful, unknown to me. My own country had taught me that nothing could happen to me if I had a successor for the crown, and we had tried and tried before the truth had come out. And when the truth did, well. I was pregnant.” She said, smiling a bit at the memory. “But my husband had a horrible rage, one that wasn’t quelled or calmed by the idea of having children. And even though I had told him, he had ignored it. I was thrown into the dungeons for nearly a year.” She said, voice growing a bit softer. “That is where I had a son.” For awhile, Rexanna paused after it, after it had left her lips, uncertain how to continue. It wasn’t a fresh pain, it had been one buried deep within and thought about often when she was on the run. “He was a stillborn, though. Just another thing they added into my crimes against the crown. Deemed me unfit, thought I had killed him in anger for being thrown in the dungeon.” It was a dark dark tale, but one that nobody had known here. And one that she had come to terms with; there were certain types of people that couldn’t be reasoned with, couldn’t change. And she had learned the hard way. “It happened a few months before they brought my back to my country to lay siege on my home. And that’s when I ran.” She eventually said, finally looking back over to Phoebe. and you're the only one who's hands drip red. the real war rages in your heart; it always has.

Phoebe

I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?

At first, she was a little confused. If Rex had children, why had she never mentioned it before? She was a midwife after all, it was usually the first thing someone brought up after finding that out. But she stayed quiet, listening in silence as Rexanna told her tale. She had known her friend's past to be tragic, but to hear the details, to know the depths of darkness she had walked through, cast a dark shadow over everything; even the sun seeming to dim with grief at the revelation. Her heart beat painfully in her chest, lungs tightening at the sheer horror and madness of the situation. Under the best of circumstances such travesties could occur. But for someone to go out of their way to make the situation so dire - over something so terribly petty - and then blame her for it? It was incomprehensible cruelty.

"Oh Rex..." she breathed sympathetically, her eyes brimming with tears by the time she glanced back at her. In an instant her arms were around her shoulders in a comforting embrace. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know..." she said, not having intended to bring up such a painful subject to her. It was wrong. Just wrong. Hers was a suffering Phoebe would not wish upon her worst enemies and yet it was one her dear friend had to bear.

REXANNA they say that war is hell, but true hell begins when the battle ends — Immediately, after the tale was done and her eyes flicked back toward Phoebe, she could see it all register and sink in. And perhaps while it all happened, Rexanna wondered if Phoebe knew she could care for herself. If she had dealt with enough demons back home, then being with Bastien had to have been a sign. But what Rexanna hadn’t expected, were the tears that welled up in Phoebe’s eyes as she moved to embrace her and Rexanna let her. Of course, the story was sad, but Rexanna had no more tears left for it. She simply embraced Phoebe back nice and tight, burying her face into her friend’s shoulder. “It happened a long time ago.” She replied, wishing to shrug her shoulders and play it off like it wasn’t a big deal. But it was a big deal. And she hugged Phoebe tight to her before pulling back slightly to offer a gentle calm smile to her friend. “I still do want to have kids one day when I’m ready. I’m not sure when that is, but one day.” Her voice was soft, but the smile that crossed her face was reflecting in the blues of her eyes. “But you’re the first person I’ve told, so. Nobody else knows or has caught on yet.” She said in a small joking kind of manner. “Don’t be sad for me, though. It’s been years since it happened. There’s so much more to look forward to.” and you're the only one who's hands drip red. the real war rages in your heart; it always has.

Phoebe

I've been very hopeful so far
Now for the first time I think we're going wrong
Hurry up and tell me this is all a dream
Or could we start again, please?

Phoebe might be a thin little thing but she was a very good hugger. Her line of work was riddled with emotions and being able to give good hugs was just as important as some of the more technical aspects of her work. ”That doesn’t matter. It’s plain enough that it still hurts you. I’m sorry.” Phoebe said quietly. To want something so badly, and then to have it taken away from you in that manner – it wasn’t something anyone would get over easily, even with the passage of time.

But true to Rexanna fashion, she turned to the idea of a brighter future, a happier one. Phoebe smiled a little and pulled back, keeping her hands on her friend’s upper arms. ”Well, you know someone who can help make sure that when you’re ready that everything will go smoothly!” Phoebe said, a bit of chipperness returning to her voice. Her work was her most treasured escape from her emotions. She couldn’t be particularly emotional as one of the few voices of reason when things got tough after all. That was part of a midwife’s job. ”I promise, I won’t tell anyone, it isn’t my business to do so…but how about I get you some supplements to take? They won’t increase fertility or anything but they will make sure your body is healthy and ready whenever you are.” she said with a soft smile. The healthier the mother, the healthier the baby. Even if she wasn’t looking to have children now, she might find some small comfort in making sure her body was ready whenever that day did come.