Disciples and Deadly Things
Phoebe Steadman
Midwife / Dean ☆ Caido Medical College
Age: 18 | Height: 5'9" | Race: Accepted | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 3 - Strg: 12 - Dext: 13 - Endr: 14 - Luck: 20
PIM - Mythical - Dragon (Electricity)
Played by: Grant Offline
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#1
PHOEBE
Phoebe had gone to the Glade to get away from everything for a moment. It was always so beautiful and calming, to simply be surrounded by life going about its business as if turmoil didn't exist all around them. Things were...uncomfortable at best as of late. The barrier was down which dismayed some, excited others, and caused a lot of uncertainty. She was expecting and while things with Emmett were better she still felt like they could fall apart at any second. Though it had resulted in an argument, she remembered the advice of a white-haired Loreseeker, and decided to take a moment for some self care.

She packed herself a little lunch and now sat amongst the flowers and grasses on a small blanket, eating a little meat hand-pie. She still had a few sweets and a couple jars of lemonade she had made. It was a refreshing way to spend the afternoon for sure. Perhaps she needed to do things like this more.
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
'Cause I'm just trying to be happy
Reply
Killian Soleil
Scout ☆ Loreseeker's Guild
Age: 19 | Height: 6'1" | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 2 - Strg: 14 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 12 - Luck: 10
Played by: Zoa Offline
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#2
KILLIAN
Killian had designated this whole day for exploring on his own, and so that was what he was doing. He had promised himself that soon he would figure out what the heck he was supposed to be doing in this world, what his purpose might be. There was time for that yet, though, right now it was much easier to simply be and learn. So today, he’d gone out into the fields and shifted into the long legged cat, who prowled the plains and blended in perfectly with the tall wind blown grass. For a while he simply stalked through the brush and ran from shade to shade, but he grew bored of these antics eventually.

And so the dappled feline delved into the glade, the most lush and gorgeous of anywhere in the Hollowed Grounds. He wove his way through the forest, rubbing his smooth golden pelt against the verdant trees as he passed them. He came upon a familiar scent, and with light steps followed it. Phoebe had laid out a picnic for herself, amid a variety of brilliantly colored flowers; she looked perfectly placed among them. A soft rumble emitted from his throat, his black tipped ears flicking as he watched her.

Then with an enthusiastic bound, Kiki emerged from the tree line into Phoebe’s clearing, shifting back to human form as he jogged towards her. He plopped himself down on the ground in front of her in a boyishly charming manner, his messy curls falling in his face as he crossed his legs. ”Hey Pheebs! Is this seat taken?” he asked as he settled himself, half teasing, and half asking if she was alright with him being there. There was value of alone time, and he didn’t want to take hers from her.

baby baby don’t be so shy
rock children hold your heads up high
Reply
Phoebe Steadman
Midwife / Dean ☆ Caido Medical College
Age: 18 | Height: 5'9" | Race: Accepted | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 3 - Strg: 12 - Dext: 13 - Endr: 14 - Luck: 20
PIM - Mythical - Dragon (Electricity)
Played by: Grant Offline
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Posts: 843
MP:
#3
PHOEBE
Phoebe heard him before she saw him. The rustling of the underbrush gave it away - though she would later realize he hadn't exactly been trying to be stealthy. She tirned her brown gaze towards the noise, gasping in alarm to see a large cat bounding out from the treeline. But before she could react fully the cat transformed into her most recent tennant. Her shoulder slumped as she sighed, relieved that it was just Killian and not a predatory animal out to eat her.

"You scared me!" she said, almost chidingly as he plopped himself down on the blanket across from her. "No it isn't." she said, catching her breath after that scare. Even if she had been out her for some alone time - which she was - she wouldn't have ever said so.
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
'Cause I'm just trying to be happy
Reply
Killian Soleil
Scout ☆ Loreseeker's Guild
Age: 19 | Height: 6'1" | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 2 - Strg: 14 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 12 - Luck: 10
Played by: Zoa Offline
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#4
KILLIAN
Killian laughed as Phoebe told him he scared her, ”Sorry, but what can I say? I’m stealthy, like a ninja,” he said with a grin, giving his head a quick shake and then tossing his hair back to try and get it out of his face (why ultimately failed when he faced her again and his curls made their way back to their usual spot).

Phoebe allowed him to sit, Kiki had already done so but now he scooted a little closer, hunching over to rest his elbows on his knees. Eyes scanned over the lunch she’d packed, it all looked at smelled amazing. ”Did you make all this?” he asked, circling a finger in gesture to the food.

baby baby don’t be so shy
rock children hold your heads up high
Reply
Phoebe Steadman
Midwife / Dean ☆ Caido Medical College
Age: 18 | Height: 5'9" | Race: Accepted | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 3 - Strg: 12 - Dext: 13 - Endr: 14 - Luck: 20
PIM - Mythical - Dragon (Electricity)
Played by: Grant Offline
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Posts: 843
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#5
PHOEBE
Phoebe stared at him blankly, clearly confused. ”A…ninja?” she said slowly, her head tilting a bit to one side. ”What’s a ninja? Is it like a…uh…oh what did he call it…” Her brows knitted together as she tried to think of the word Jeremy had used when she first met him. ”A robot? Or a auto-ma-ton? Is that what a ninja is?” she said, tried to piece disparate pieces of nonsensical knowledge together.

She glanced at the food and nodded. ”I did. I just came out here to sit and think and decided to bring lunch too. This is my favorite place in the whole Hallowed Grounds.” she said with a small smile. ”Are you hungry? You can have some.” she offered. ”What brings you all the way out here? I thought you were off looking for work.” she said conversationally.
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
'Cause I'm just trying to be happy
Reply
Killian Soleil
Scout ☆ Loreseeker's Guild
Age: 19 | Height: 6'1" | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 2 - Strg: 14 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 12 - Luck: 10
Played by: Zoa Offline
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Posts: 127
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#6
KILLIAN
Kiki raised his eyebrows as Phoebe asked him what a ninja was. What! They didn’t even have ninjas where she was from? Her world must’ve been medieval or something, or else very small. He opened his mouth to answer but she continued on guessing, instead equating ninjas to robots with the most thoughtful of looks. He let out an amused laugh, his mouth widening to a grin and his eyes creasing, ”No, not quite.” He settled his laughter some before continuing with a friendly look and ninja hand gestures to accompany his description, ”Ninja’s are like the masters of stealth, they wear all black and run around with swords and throwing stars. They’re like warriors but sneaky,” he said.

So Phoebe was a chef too, Killian have her an impressed nod as he surveyed the lunch she’d made. ”Yeah this is definitely a good spot for a picnic,” he said in response to her remark about the glade. Her next question brought a soft smile to his lips, he’d hoped she’d offer but would never ask. At least not until they were closer friends, for now he didn’t think they were on a ‘take first ask questions later’ basis. ”I would love some, thanks!” he said, reaching for one of the sweet looking rolls she’d brought. Before diving in, he quirked a brow at her, as if to ask if she was sure.

Killian leaned back now, legs still crisscrossed but his palm resting on the blanket behind him, the other holding the pastry. She asked about him finding work, and he gave a small shrug and a tilt of his head, ”I was, but it got kind of boring so I came for a run,” he replied, as though boring was a good enough reason to shirk his responsibilities. To him, it always had been, but here things would likely change. He had to provide for himself now, his responsibilities were to himself. He had realized this, and so he had at least tried to find a job.

”I actually talked to Jigano at the Atheneum, he told me about the guild and how they are also explorers. I was thinking maybe I’d ask him about helping out with that bit, mapping out places and stuff,” he said, with more seriousness and consideration than his previous answer.

baby baby don’t be so shy
rock children hold your heads up high
Reply
Phoebe Steadman
Midwife / Dean ☆ Caido Medical College
Age: 18 | Height: 5'9" | Race: Accepted | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 3 - Strg: 12 - Dext: 13 - Endr: 14 - Luck: 20
PIM - Mythical - Dragon (Electricity)
Played by: Grant Offline
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Posts: 843
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#7
PHOEBE
"Oh." she said with a blush, feeling a little stupid. It still shocked her how different all of these worlds were. Some were so much like Northwind and others had things like robots and ninjas. "So...they are like assassins?" she guessed, still trying to put what he was describing in a context she had a better grasp of.

She smiled and nodded a bit when he seemed to ask for further permission to eat the sweet bun. She didn't agree to things if she didn't mean it and she was happy to share. "Boring, huh?" she said with a light laugh. That was a rather childish excuse to stop doing something wasn't it? "Well, what did you do in the world you are from? Certainly you did something to earn a living." she said, trying to prompt him to think about it a little more in depth.

At the mention of Jigano though she frowned a bit. "Well that wouldn't be terribly bad. Just know that Jigano is a bit...inflexible. If you don't agree with him wholeheartedly on a subject he will berate you and pepper you with questions until you do or leave." she said as a sort of warning. Her last encounter with him had ended horribly, and she had never gone back to the Athaeneum to look for anything to read because of it.
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
'Cause I'm just trying to be happy
Reply
Killian Soleil
Scout ☆ Loreseeker's Guild
Age: 19 | Height: 6'1" | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 2 - Strg: 14 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 12 - Luck: 10
Played by: Zoa Offline
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Posts: 127
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#8
KILLIAN
"Uhh, yeah actually! Except nicer maybe?" he said with a bit of a shrug, a trace of laughter still in his voice. And she had no reason to feel stupid about anything, she knew far more about this world than he did, and knowing what a ninja was in a world without ninjas didn't do him good anyway.

Her smile and nod were met with a grin and playful, "Pheebs, your a goddess." He then took a bite of the pastry, closing his eyes as the savory sweetness excited his taste buds and filled him with warmth. She questioned his response of 'boring', he paused then and let out a small chuckle. He heard it now, how stupid that excuse sounded. His amusement with his own ridiculousness stopped when she asked what used to do back in his world.

"Oh well, not exactly," he said, holding the roll at his lap as he thought about what to say. He hadn't talked much about his life to anyone yet, now seemed as good a time as ever though, he trusted Phoebe. "Back on my world, I was... I got chosen by this goddess to be a kind of symbolic leader, so I've spent most of my life training and learning to be that leader. I didn't need a job because I was provided for by my nation." he explained in a more serious tone, with a tinge of bitterness.

"I can't complain, cause I know that I technically had a great life, but I didn't really want it all. I would've rather just lived with my mom and been my own me in our village," he trailed off as he moved into his thoughts some, imagining his life without the blessing of the goddess. Would he really be happier, or was he just being ungrateful for what he was given? He hoped that Phoebe wouldn't see it that way, because he had never meant to be ungrateful. He just wasn't the right choice, he'd never believed that it was him who was supposed to be given the blessing. He'd always felt short of the leader he was meant to be. And he spited both himself and the nation for it.

"Anyway... so that's..." he started, then brought up a hand to run it through his curls, feeling almost a little embarrassed by it all, "that's that."

Phoebe's warning about Jigano sparked a memory from his first meeting with the man, the passing look on his face at the mention of Phoebe. He didn't need to know any more details, from what she said he could piece together pretty well what had happened. He did wonder though, who had truly been at fault, if either. He just nodded in response, bringing his pastry up for another bite.

baby baby don’t be so shy
rock children hold your heads up high
Reply
Phoebe Steadman
Midwife / Dean ☆ Caido Medical College
Age: 18 | Height: 5'9" | Race: Accepted | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 3 - Strg: 12 - Dext: 13 - Endr: 14 - Luck: 20
PIM - Mythical - Dragon (Electricity)
Played by: Grant Offline
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Posts: 843
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#9
PHOEBE
Her cheeks flushed and eyes widened at the compliment. A goddess? "I don't think that's a fair comparison. I am certain any goddess would be offended." she said with a light laugh. Of course, the only goddess she knew was Safrin, and it was incredibly clear to her at least that she paled in comparison to the starlit goddess. Perhaps goddesses weren't so grand where he came from? Something made her doubt that but it was the only reasonable explanation she could think of to be compared to a deity.

Her head tilted slightly as Killian began to explain how his life had been in his original world. Chosen by a goddess? A symbolic leader? Suddenly she felt incredibly small by comparison. It seemed most everyone from these other worlds were important in some manner...and then there was common midwife her. "I didn't realize you held such a high station back home. What were your duties then? Certainly if a goddess chose you she explained why?" she asked out of curiosity. "The gods and goddesses here I think have some favoritism, but I haven't heard of any of them choosing leaders or anything like that."

Having it all but not wanting it. A very cliche thing for a person of power to say, she thought. "Well, as someone who was just herself in a little village with her family, I think you were very lucky." she said quietly, looking down at her lap. "When you're a nobody, everything you do is inconsequential. Sure it might affect your life but in the grand scheme of things it's pretty meaningless - you are pretty meaningless. But when you are a somebody, chosen by a goddess or a king or just particular person of known importance, you might have the difficulties that come with fame and expectation, but you can actually do things. You can change the world for better or worse. Knowing how to do that well is invaluable." she said with a small smile.
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
'Cause I'm just trying to be happy
Reply
Killian Soleil
Scout ☆ Loreseeker's Guild
Age: 19 | Height: 6'1" | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 2 - Strg: 14 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 12 - Luck: 10
Played by: Zoa Offline
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Posts: 127
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#10
KILLIAN
There she went again, being way too modest. She had a way of turning almost every compliment he gave her into something belittling, and he hoped she didn't actually think that way. Everyone needed to feel like a goddess now and then after all. Still chewing his food he gave her a wink and replied as best he could, "Doubt it, they should be honored, I know I'd be."

Kiki shook his head at the word's high station. It wasn't really like that, he didn't actually have any power yet, he held no authority over anyone. Until the goddess gave him her full power, his role was rather pointless. "Duties? I don't know, I had to learn to fight, and I had to know all the customs and political aspects."

"No, she never explained it, and I don't really think she knew what she was doing, cause I'm not good for it," Killian said dismissively, having believed this forever. She'd made a mistake

Killian looked to Phoebe as she began to talk, explaining why he should be gracious, how he'd been given a gift. He nodded, glancing down at his lap as he thought. He'd heard this all before. And he knew it was true, but it just wasn't his life. He wasn't meant to be some great and holy hero, at least not the one that his nation wanted him to be. He'd been captive in his own fate and drowning too, and while there were parts he was grateful for, like being provided for and having such a unique bond with the goddess, the other parts had brought nothing but angst and frustration.

"Well," he started, looking back to Phoebe with a quick shake of his head, "I don’t think not having authority means your life is meaningless, it certainly doesn’t make you a nobody. My mom was born poor and on the outskirts of our region, and she was one of the most important and amazing people, so fuck the grand scheme of things,” he said, then to address... really everything, ”And, well there's nothing I can do now anyway, soon the goddess will realize that I'm gone, and she'll pick some new kid to be her heir, and maybe they'll be that great leader. I hope." he said with a light smile, but a bit of a solemn one.

baby baby don’t be so shy
rock children hold your heads up high
Reply
Phoebe Steadman
Midwife / Dean ☆ Caido Medical College
Age: 18 | Height: 5'9" | Race: Accepted | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 3 - Strg: 12 - Dext: 13 - Endr: 14 - Luck: 20
PIM - Mythical - Dragon (Electricity)
Played by: Grant Offline
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Posts: 843
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#11
PHOEBE
"You're too kind." she said with a light laugh, shaking her head. She couldn't imagine Safrin being honored being compared to her. Her roots were humble, her life was humble, and humbleness seemed antonymous to goddess-like. But perhaps the deities in the world he came from were more...human-like? That was the only explanation she could come up with that made any sense. Why else would he compare her to a goddess?

Her head tilted slightly as he began to explain what he had been taught, and how he considered himself unfit for the role. "Well, if your goddesses were anything like those here, I would doubt you unfit. I've yet to meet a deity that didn't seem completely sure of what they were doing." she said to try and boost him up a bit. He seemed a very nice and quick sort, she couldn't imagine why he wouldn't be fit to take on a leadership role. Killian was enigmatic, which seemed to overshadow all faults in a leader if history was to be believed. Someone who could earn trust and inspire - in whatever manner that manifested - was the winning combination of leadership.

She fell silent again as he continued on, dismissing what she said with a rather naughty word. He had misunderstood in a way, but it wasn't particularly important. Her brow furrowed a little as he spoke, seeming equal parts frustrated, relieved, and...lost. Phoebe considered all he head said, settling after a moment on a conclusion about the state of mind he was in, feeling sorry for him all of a sudden. "It must be very hard to go from a world where you path was set, and purpose clear, to one where there is no set path and no clear purpose. The possibilities must be overwhelming." Overwhelming to the point that moving forward might seem impossible, freezing him in place rather than pushing him to continue on.
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
'Cause I'm just trying to be happy
Reply
Killian Soleil
Scout ☆ Loreseeker's Guild
Age: 19 | Height: 6'1" | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 2 - Strg: 14 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 12 - Luck: 10
Played by: Zoa Offline
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Posts: 127
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#12
KILLIAN
Well, if your goddesses were anything like those here, I would doubt you unfit. He heard her, and logically that should make sense. That goddesses must know what they were doing, they were goddesses after all. But Killian still couldn't believe it, it would take longer than that to chip away a life time of feeling wrong. The goddess had always believed in him, been by his side. It wasn't necessarily her that had made him feel so inadequate, but the life that the reign had told him to live. That was where he fell short, and he'd come to believe that because their life was supposedly the right one, he was simply dysfunctional.

Whether or not the goddess agreed wasn't enough, and she never did tell him now did she? No, she must've made a mistake, that was the only explanation as to why he hadn't fit in the world he was made. He just didn't have that same faith as Phoebe, that the gods were so sure. If they were human enough to war, they were human enough to err.

"I guess," was his simple and avoidant response, because he didn't want to pry further into the validity of gods.

After Killian's whole bit about how he felt, and how it was a lost cause anyway, there was a moment of silence. Killian looked down, eyebrows furrowed with frustration and hoping he hadn't said anything to offend Phoebe. He just didn't know what he was doing, he was indeed lost. But then she spoke up again, and what she said seemed to fit perfectly. Somehow she'd pulled the truth out of all his mixed up feelings, and to be understood felt like a small weight had been lifted from his broad shoulders.

He nodded, still looking down. "Especially when I couldn't even do that one thing right. I had one job Phoebe, and every chance I got I made the wrong decision. Sometimes I think I just wanted to prove to them what I always thought, that I wasn't good enough. I don't know, it's just like, if I couldn't be right when all the rules were laid out for me, how am I supposed to figure out what I'm doing when I have absolutely nothing to go on? I wanted to have all this freedom, and it feels great, but I don't want to waste it."

baby baby don’t be so shy
rock children hold your heads up high
Reply
Phoebe Steadman
Midwife / Dean ☆ Caido Medical College
Age: 18 | Height: 5'9" | Race: Accepted | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 3 - Strg: 12 - Dext: 13 - Endr: 14 - Luck: 20
PIM - Mythical - Dragon (Electricity)
Played by: Grant Offline
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Posts: 843
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#13
PHOEBE
She listened quietly as he vented his frustrations and shortcomings, failures and insecurities. The little meat handpie she had made herself she ate quietly, letting him talk at her as she processed what he had to say, and what might make him feel better and move forward. "I started apprenticing as a midwife when I was seven." she said at length, considering the pie in her hand thoughtfully. "And at the same time my mother was teaching me to be a good wife. Cook. Clean. Keep house. Sewing. Knitting. Things like that." she said. Perhaps her path wasn't filled with as many rules as his, but it was filled with expectations. She would be a midwife, and she would be a wife and mother. That was her lot.

"Now, it might seem obvious, but as a midwife, I am supposed to help women through their pregnancies, as well as before and after care. And it's a dangerous thing really, having a baby. So you train and practice and watch and learn for years, and then one day you're ten and your teacher tells you to take the lead. And you're very excited because this is exactly what you have been learning to do and you do everything just like you're supposed to and you follow the plan exactly... and the mother and child die anyways, because of a small oversight. A little mistake, something you might have been able to prevent if you had just a bit more experience but still probably not, or so your teacher says." she said quietly, before looking over at him. "But that mistake doesn't mean I wasn't cut out to be a midwife. It means I still had more to learn. I had room to grow. That I was human. Just because you made mistakes and felt out of your depth in what you did before doesn't mean you weren't cut out for it. And now that you have the opportunity to start again, your old mistakes don't mean you will fail now, or that you won't fail again. Failure is just part of life. It's fine to be down for a bit but you need to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and do better next time." she said with a small smile.

"Perhaps you should pray to the gods here. I doubt they would tell you exactly what to do, but they might give you the confidence to find it for yourself. I know they have done so for me."
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
'Cause I'm just trying to be happy
Reply
Killian Soleil
Scout ☆ Loreseeker's Guild
Age: 19 | Height: 6'1" | Race: Attuned | Nationality: Outlander
Level: 2 - Strg: 14 - Dext: 15 - Endr: 12 - Luck: 10
Played by: Zoa Offline
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Posts: 127
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#14
KILLIAN
When Phoebe began to tell her story, Killian looked up from his lap. She spoke so calmly, so resolve with what she had to say. He listened attentively, truly taking in her story. There was a sickening hurt in his stomach when he realized what had happened with the mother and the child and thought about how devastating a moment that must've been. To make a mistake that big, to be unable to help as a family is destroyed before your eyes.

And to keep on going. Phoebe was very strong, he decided, to be brave enough to continue her work. A small smile tugged at his lips as he looked at her, with nothing but admiration. She was far more resolute than he could ever wish to be, through dark times she had stayed her path. And in the end she'd turned out rather amazing.

She finished her little speech, Killian nodded, smiling with her. She was right, in everything she told him. This world was his second chance, to fail and succeed and make choices. He just needed a little more time. "Thank you Phoebe, you... you're pretty great," he said with a contentedness about him, though his frustrations still buzzed at the back of his mind, quieted at least by Phoebe's words. He brought the pastry to his lips again, to finish it off with a few quick bites.

The golden haired girl offered him a suggestion, to go speak with the gods. Killian had passed a shrine once or twice, and the gods were certainly a hot topic around Caido. Though he'd tried so far to steer clear of him. It felt a little strange, to pray to a god that wasn't his own. Wasn't the goddess who had been a presence throughout his life. And also, he had mixed feelings about the higher beings, and how they could be so kind and yet so cruel to their creations. He didn't know what to think.

Though it was always worth a shot, and he would give it some thought. "So you've really met them? Can you tell me what their like? or is that like confidential Gods and Phoebe only stuff?" he asked, lightening as they shifted the subject from his past and his troubles.

baby baby don’t be so shy
rock children hold your heads up high
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